Sexuality Happens

Yeah. I know you usually don’t hear that. Usually, people have horror stories of trips to the OB-GYN.

Not this time.

I’ve never had a big issue with any of my gynos. There was the one older lady who was telling me how to uplse the Nuva Ring and da”so when you and your boyfriend are making love…” and to whom I replied “well, he’s not my boyfriend. And we don’t make love. We have sex, and occasionally we fuck.”

Then there was the gyno at Planned Parenthood who lost ALL of my STI test results, and I have to get it all done again.

But no big issues. I mean, I’ve heard of lesbians who came out, and were told that they didn’t need to be there, and never needed pap smears (EVERY female-bodied person need a pap smear yearly. Okthnxby). I’ve heard of people who were man/woman handled, and had sore vaginas for days. I’ve heard of people who were in and out in 5 minutes, and weren’t offered STI testing. I’ve heard so many horrible OB-GYN experiences.

Not this time.

I went to Dr. Helene Koch (and her PA, Katja) who are in a suburb of Philly. If you live in the Philly area, I HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend them.

Why so “great”?

*They were LGBTQ friendly. I was asked if I currently had a partner (not boyfriend). When they asked how many sexual partners I have had, they explained that “sexual partner” was anyone I had exchanged fluids with, not just the traditional “Penis in Vagina INTERCOURSE.” When they asked when I became sexually active, again, it meant any type of sexual activity, not just PIV sex. I was floored.

*They recommended Gardasil to me (it was moot, since I’ve already gotten it), even though I told them I wasn’t sexually active currently with male bodied people. 10 points!

*Katja is from Vermont and misses it like I miss CO.

*Instead of having to go through the whole rigamorale about “yes, I’m on the Nuva Ring. no, I’m not having sex with penises. yes, I take it continuously, and only have my period 2-3 times year.” She even asked “are you on any hormonal birth control to control your period” which was a great way to phrase it. And then, when I needed a new prescription for the Nuva Ring, they had a stamp they used on the script that explained it all to the pharmacist, so I don’t have to go through my spiel there.

*They had cloth gowns, instead of paper shirts. Ugh.

*They did a domestic violence screening, even though I told them I was single and lived alone. That was AWESOME. All medical professionals should be that conscientious.

*They offered me a full panel of STI screening, and two different type of pap smears, instead of just telling me what I did/didn’t need.

*They didn’t give me a whole lecture about my weight. They found out I had low blood and low cholesterol and was healthy, and that was all that mattered.

*When they took my blood, they listened to me when I told them to use a butterfly, and in my hand. They did, and it only took one prick. Usually, people say “I bet I can get it out of your arm” and it winds up taking 3 or 4 tries. It was amazing.

*She told me I had a very beautiful cervix. So take that!

I never realized how much sex positivism could be incorporated into a OB-GYN appointment until I had it today. My other experiences weren’t bad…but it was like growing up on American cheese, and discovering Brie. Or steak at Perkins/Denny’s/IHOP and then going to Ruth Chris’ Steakhouse. You just didn’t realize how good it could be until you have the better version.

Anyways, everyone is always complaining about their bad experiences, so I thought it only just that I give a shout out for my good experience, because it really has just made my day. Yeah, I know, I’m weird.

-Essin’ Em