Sexuality Happens

The other night, F came over.  To watch a movie. We decided on Secretary (of course). I popped it in, and we made out a little on my bed.  I told her that sometime I wanted her to tie me up, and leave marks all over me.  She said she’d be interested in that.  And then we lay together, cuddling, kissing, etc, as the opening scenes played out. And then we had a conversation that went pretty much like this (keep in mind we were both lying in my bed in our underwear):

F: “I’m in an interesting place emotionally. I’d really just like to cuddle tonight.”

Me: “Ok, you’ve got it! I’m not wearing sex underwear anyways (Femmes, do you understand what I mean by this???)  Can we have a hot and sexy make out night?”

F: “Mmmm. Sounds good.” *kisses me. kisses me more.* “Sex underwear? What’s that?” *cue my explanation, and more kissing*

Me: “Yay. I like kissing.”

F: “Me too.” *Kisses me more.  I am now somehow straddling her hips, and she’s pulling off my underwear (non-sex underwear, to clarify), and is pulling my towards her face.*

Me: “No no no.  This is a sex-free night.”

F: “Oh? Is it?” *Has my underwear off by now, my cunt getting closer to her mouth.*

Me: “Yes! You said you just wanted to cuddle! This isn’t cuddling!” *My breathing is getting heavy at this point – I can feel her breath on my vulva*

F: “Really? Interesting…”

Me: “I am TRYING to be the good person here. I’m TRYING to just cuddle. But you’ve got me on your face!” (I was channeling Coupling, the episode with Susan and epidural — I figured if I asked three times, and she still wanted to do it, I was good to go!)

F: “Are you complaining?” *begins to lick*

Me: “No.” *cue unintelligible moans*

It was hot. Really fucking hot.  And in case you were wondering, we’ve discovered (by accident) that I can bend in half backwards.  Like can put my head on the bed by your feet while riding your face bend in half.

We talked for a bit about collars. She said she’d be interested in trying that, so I buckled one around her neck.  Bad plan. Don’t do that when someone has a fuck-ton of emotional processing to do. I could tell something was off, so I wound up taking off the collar and lying with my arm around her for the rest of the movie as she drifted in and out of sleep.

When the movie was over, we were cuddling, and I was lightly running my fingers and nails over her.  She gave me permission to play with her, and I did. It was amazing.  Between the two of us, and a little lube, she let me work in and out of her until most of my hand was in her, gently moving, causing her to shake and shudder with every slight movement. And then she asked for my mouth…and I’ve yet to deny her anything, so I lowered my head, and she came. My hand inside her, my mouth on her clit, my free hand holding her. Amazing.

And then, she tied me up. I haven’t been tied up since I was with J.  So almost a year at this point. I forgot how much I love it…

She’s hesitant. She doesn’t want to hurt me. It doesn’t matter how many times I tell her she’s fine, that I will let her know, she holds back.  She let me teach her how to put clothespins on my nipples (Oh Em Gee yes please thank you), but then was apprehensive as to whether they hurt to much. She let me top her from the bottom; “you could bite me here” and “you can use the wartenburg wheel if you’d like.”  She has it in her, I know it. When she pins me, I feel a strike of lightening between my legs…I just need to wait for her to come into her own.

But dom-ness aside, she knows what she’s doing.  She taunted and teased, teased and taunted, and finally went down on me, until I came.  Fine. Dandy. It was good, but nothing new….until she fucked the life out of me. I kid you not.  She fucked me hard, and I came hard…two or three times.  I asked her to untie me, so I could touch her – I have a thing about holding onto people. I excepted her to do it right away…but she just grinned at me, and kept fucking me. I came hard again a few times…and then I asked her to let me touch her again.  Again, she shook her head, asked me if I was trying to tell her what to do, and fucked me more.  And I came, more. Finally, she untied my right, and I got my left, her fingers still inside me, and then she fucked me. Without meaning to, I clawed her back, and came harder than I ever have with another person.

As we cuddle, I said stupid things, as usual. Although she said some funny things too. It just worked.

In the morning, we took a shower together (no shower sex though).  I soaped up her body as she stood with her hands on the wall, legs slightly apart. It took everything I had (plus knowing she had to get going) that kept me from fucking her…and when she rubbed all over my body, slipping in a few hand spanks to the ass, I had to concentrate on my breathing in order to not jump her.

We had a talk that night, after I pointed out that it was the third time (separate day if you will) that we’d had sex, and that I hadn’t had sex with anyone more than twice since J. We talked about it being a perfect situation; that neither of us was looking for a long term relationship or to be in love, yet it was clear that we were friends, and cared about one another, and had amazing sex. Communication is bloody fucking key people, bloody fucking key!

So she’s fixed me.  I am no longer solely a slut want to be; I’m a slut want to be with a stunning and amazing friend with benefits.

Life is good.

-Essin’ Em