Sexuality Happens

2008 has not been the best year for me.  I’ve spent almost 5 months (on and off) with out a full time job.  I’ve been without insurance since I moved to Colorado. My grandmother died. I was in a bad car crash on the way to her funeral.  I severely injured my ankle, and went deep into debt to fix it.  My baby (kitty) Athena passed away. I was in another car accident. I finishd grad school, going further into debt to do so.  I can’t get a job, and keep getting told that I’m over qualified because of my Master’s. I took it off my resume. My knees have gotten infinitely worse, especially in the last six-eight months. I can’t afford my celebrex, my allergy meds, or some of my migraine meds.

However, there have been some good things too. I’ve met some amazing people via the blogosphere (even some in real life like Miss Avarice, AAG, Sinclair, Urban Gypsy, and more).

I moved back to Colorado…which while the move heavily depleted my bank account, and I got hurt, and have no job, there is no where else this second where I would rather be.  My best friend here (and my one from Seattle who visits her family here) make up for almost everything.  My new friends. My old friends I’ve rekindled. My crushes, most of which have become friends. The Denver Roller Dolls.  The weather where it’ll be 70 degrees in November, snow one day in December, and be sunny and melted the next day, where the cold doesn’t go through to your bones, and where you can pretty much wear a hoodie and flip flops year round.  The people who stop to ask you if you are ok if you’re sad or look lost, who (for the most part) don’t cut you off, and where neighbors actually want to meet you, and help you out.  Where you almost NEVER hear anyone honk.  Where you can parallel park without bumping bumpers, and you don’t pay $24 for a few hours of parking. Where GOOD Mexican food can be had upon demand, all the time. Yes, I am glad to be back in Colorado.

J and I broke up in 2007, but the drama and hurt continued on into spring and summer 2008. He’d hurt me, I’d forgive him, we’d be friends. I let it happen again and again.  Finally, I gave up, and deleted him out of my phone. I emailed him when Athena died, but that’s been it.  I met K — one of the most interesting and amazing people I know. As I’ve been cleaning up my house, I put up this cool photo collage thing on my wall. And now he stares at me from above the TV, blue eyes piercing me, flipping me off.  He is a solid friend, someone to play with, someone to bitch about work with, someone who has been there for me during some of the harder parts of this year. I really appreciate him, and hope he’ll come visit next summer for Thunder.

And then there is F.  We drive each other crazy…both in the good way and the bad way. We love each other very much, and frustrate each other very much.  Regardless, I am glad that she came back into my life. So glad.  And did I mention we’re shooting for Crash Pad Series and NoFauxxx.com this January? Please remember to check us out! Also, if we can find a working video camera, we’ll be doing a video for GoodDykePorn too. We’re crazy. I know. But when we’re on, we’re on. And the sex is amazing.  And for now, that is enough for me.

I’ve been selected by Rachel Kramer Bussel and Ravenous Romance to have two of my stories published in their e-books. Look for my work in The Lust Chronicles and Sex and Music.

Hysteria Boutique, the local sex-positive, queer inclusive sex toy store has been kind enough to have me as a resident workshop presented and educator, and I’ve been teaching some really fun and fabulous classes there.  I love teaching/educating, so I’ve really enjoyed that.

I’ve done some really cool and fun photoshoots (as you’ve seen from some of the photos I’ve posted on here), and hope to do more. Maymay, AAG, Mr. Coypink and Sinclair have helped me move my site, get it hosted, and make it pretty. I’ve become a twitter-aholic. I have some new porn star crushes; Jiz Lee, Madison Young, IAmFiveStar. I made lots of new sex blog friends…and a few non-blogger friend who commented, and I then met in the real world…including a friend I used to figure skate with. 

Did I mention I finished my Master’s degree? I mean, I can’t find anyone that wants to use it right now, but that’s a big accomplishment, damn it.

Parts of 2008 have seemed like a year of hell for me…but there have certainly been some positives too.  It will be interesting to see what comes next…

-Essin’ Em

If you were to visit me, you would notice a preponderance of candles in my house. On the dining room tables, the kitchen counter, the top of the fridge, in my bedroom, on the bookshelves (ok, not a wise sounding idea, but those are ones that aren’t going to get lit for a while). It’s one of my most stereotypical Femme/feminine traits; I LOVE candles. Especially good smelling ones.

Well, luckily, Babeland was kind enough to give me an Afterglow Candle (by Jimmy Jane) to review.

In the little box that arrived, I got the candle (which is a really good sized candle), a GIANT box of matches (score!) and a little brush.  When you light the candle, and it melts, it turns into massage oil, which feels phenomenal when poured warm onto the skin.

Brush wise, I have to say I didn’t get it.  I’m not sure why you’re supposed to use a brush to put oil/wax onto the skin. It just didn’t work for me. However, it is my cat’s (Kinsey) absolute new favorite toy – even more loved then his decimated peacock feather. So it certainly has it’s uses.

I got the Figleaf scent…and it was AMAZING. I lit it, and immediately, a soft but delicious smell started to fill the room. It was a little flowery, but not too much so…and it wasn’t super strong, which can ruin a moment.  No no – it was ideal. And mmmm.

We let the candle burn as we played, and then she poured some of the wax/oil onto my back. As she rubbed it in, the tension left me completely.  It started, after 10-15 minutes to absorb into my skin, leaving my skin soft and smelling delightful.  A small amount was dropped on my nightstand, but it later hardened back into wax, and was easy to get off with a finger nail.

I love this candle.  So far, it’s my favorite massage oil candle, and it’s also a great into for people who want to try wax play, but don’t want to start with “real” wax. It has a very low burning temp, making it great for anyone! Five stars, out of five!

For your very own warm, loving and caring (hey, I can anthropomorphize a candle, right?) Afterglow Candle, just click here! 

-Essin’ Em

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #156? Submit a link to your best post of the week by emailing me directly at radicalvixenatgmaildotcom Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
I’m kind of … insatiable.
“She’s gasping already. Each breath a moan, each touch connected to the noises she makes.”

The most spankable day of the year
“And for spankos, they are a high holy day to be approached with all the reverence and gaiety of a Pagan-cum Christian holiday.”

Private club
“It’s that kind of club – the kind you have to know about, the kind that doesn’t even have a name.”

Sugasm Editor
Sex Work And Honesty: Being Childfree

Editor’s Choice
I Wonder

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Autobiography of a Masturbator: Porn O’Graphicus, Part 5
Believing the Bullshit. Confession #202
Good Girl
Performance pressure
The Truth is, I’m Lonely

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio
Angel Dark & Tereza Ilova – Close Friends
HNT: Tie
Purple Passion
Sibelle – Toyed
Vintage Kink Wednesday
What Santa Sees Through My Window….

Sex Work
High Heel Sucking and Dripping Dicks
Sex work and the right to choose

Sex Humor
Monday Mirage: Hundred Orgasm Woods
Who’s Your Daddy? Vader vs. Joker
WTF To Do With a Botched Trim Job

BDSM & Fetish
A Boy and his Sleepsack
Call my name
Feast
I smell like sex
My First Over-The-Knee Spanking
The only DIY Leather Hood on the net
Sex Life Snapshot
Tie Me to the Ends of Love, Part 3

Sex News, Reviews, & Interviews
12 Days of Christmas Sex Toys List
Beautiful Blonde Bondage Model Dia Zerva Endures Her Most Intense And Brutal Impact Play Scene Of Her Career
Bondage Model Christina Carter And Master Rigger Lochai In An Erotic Dance Of D/s on Hogtied
Fetish Pinup – Bettie Page dead at 85
Fresh Of The Presses, The Orgasm Bar 8 On DVD.
Fucking on Flickr
Hot Erotic Holiday E-books
On The 12th Day of Christmas: We-Vibe
Tribute to Bettie Page: Queen of Kink
Women In The Industry

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Almond’s Joy
Astrid, your mouth fucked my cock.
Casual Poetry
Headhunter
I Hurt
Mesmerizing Love
She Walks in Beauty Like the Night…
VIP anal, threesome, ATM
Windows

F and I called it quits. Last week, the first night of Channukah (great timing, I know). She had left, but came back for the ziplock baggy of latkes (potato pancakes) that I had put together for her.  We sat down on the couch in my mother’s living room…she’d been over for her first Channukah celebration.

She was telling me that in addition to the emotional distance she had asked for before, she now needed physical distance. That she was frustrated, and angry, and unsure why she was feeling like that, which was frustrating her even more. I was taking it in. She needed more space. I didn’t know how much more space I could give her. I was trying.  We hadn’t had sex in weeks.  And the last time we did, it was completely disconnected. How else could I give her space? I mean, yes, I could totally avoid her, but I also was dealing with my birthday and the loss of Athena. I couldn’t have gone through that with out her.  I wonder if she waited to see that I was finally beginning to heal from Athena before she brought this up.

All dinner, we never kissed.  Afterwards, I went for a cheek kiss, and she pecked me quickly on the lips. I knew then that things were heading for another conversation.

We sat there talking, as my mother and sister sat watching TV in the other room.  My heart tightening, tears welling up on my eyes.  It’s so hard, when you care about someone so much, to realize how unhealthy it is for you to be together, regardless of what the relationship is. She told me that she felt some of her needs weren’t being met. I told her that over the last few months, that very few of my needs had been met, and that I was scared to bring them up to her, for fear of hurting her feelings.  Then she told me that she felt judged when she shared her feelings.

I’ve always been the emotional ones.  All my friends tell me I’m too sensitive, that I put too much stock into my emotions.  In grad school, I was the one who over shared, the one who was so into the affective learning, into talking about how we felt.  But then here was F, telling me that I was always using my head energy, that the only time I used my heart energy was during sex.  That I didn’t feel enough. That I was too logical. That hurt so much, every time she said something to that effect. 

So we talked. About how much we loved for and cared for each other. About how she still wanted me to come to her family’s Christmas Eve celebration. About how much her holding me that one night as I sobbed about Athena had meant to me.

And then she was gone.

I walked into the other room, stunned. My sister and mother were surprised…my mother asked me if it would have happened had she not come back for the latkes. I was sure it would have. I feel like she couldn’t even be in the same room with me any more. It hurt.

It happened on Channukah. The first night.  I have a great time with ending relationships that coincide with holidays. Last year, J broke up with me a week before Thanksgiving…when I was supposed to spend it with him and his family. My high school boyfriend and I broke up on Valentine’s Day. And now this.

I suppose I should have realized it was coming. Every little piece of my life is being slowly pulled, tugged, or ripped away from me. I don’t even have a sex partner anymore. I don’t have that one person whose arms I felt safe it, the one that I trusted. I have never trusted anyone I’ve been with that much. I got over so much baggage in order to do so. I peeled opened old wounds in order to show her how much I trusted her. I cried in front of her, with her, in her arms. I feel stupid.

And I feel stupid for having tried so hard, for having changed some of my thoughts and actions, for appeasing. But I loved her. Still do.

All in all, it’s probably the least angry, upsetting break-off of whatever it was that I’ve ever had.  Which is good.  I cried a little. Went home, intent on drinking.  Didn’t touch a drop.  Put on my flannel PJs, cried a little more, ate some dark chocolate. Thought on it. Cried a little more, no longer about her. More about my fears. That I’ll stop trusting again. That I will never be loved. That I will never find someone who will hold me as I cry. That I’ll go through all the letter in the alphabet, and while I’ll have good sex, and people who might love me, that I’ll never find someone who wants me for me, and wants to be with me. That I’ll never have sex this good ever again.  Fill in the blank.

And then I wrote this.  And went to bed. Alone. As usual. And wished things could have been different.

-Essin’ Em

Edit: Since writing this, we have talked more. Basically, we’ve figured out that we have this bi-polar relationship. And the reason we have such amazing sex, and such ridiculous frustrations and arguments is because we both care about each other very much, and we’re both ridiculously passionate.  Passion = fantabulous sex. And also volatile emotions.  Since I’ve broken up, we’ve hung out together, I spent my first Christmas Eve (that I’ve celebrated) with her family, we’ve argued more, and we’ve had incredible sex.  Yes. It’s cyclical. However, I’m now in it with no expectations, and as friends who happen to have really really really good sex occasionally.  And I’m ok with that. I’d still like to find someone who would like to be with *me* but I also really care about F.  And will continue to try and change and morph and figure things out. Will it bite me in the ass? Possibly.  But it’s better than not feeling at all.

From this gallery on Barely Evil

Pleasurists is your round-up of the adult product reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #8? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #10? Submit it here before Sunday December 14th at 11:59pm PST. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• 1000th Comment Giveaway! Deadline: when the 1000th comment is posted.
• Holiday Contest!! Deadline: December 24th.
• A Holiday Bunny Giveaway! Deadline: Friday December 26th at 11:59pm PST.
• Swag Contest: Win a Rabbit Habit or Pink Kink Kit! Deadline: December 27th, 8pm PST
• Win a Hot New Sex Toy! Deadline: February 1st.

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

• Don Wands Candy Cane by Curvaceous Dee

Verdict: A gorgeous present to go in any bad girl’s stocking – or a good girl’s stocking, if you want to corrupt her in a most pleasant fashion.

Note: I couldn’t pass up picking this particularly festive toy! There are some gorgeous pictures with this review as well (as usual for Dee).

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus Sexgeek

Vibrators

• Ride the Passion Wave by Adriana
• LELO’s Mia by Epiphora
• Trojan Vibrating Touch Fingertip Massager by Erin Leone
• Hitachi Magic Wand by Essin’ Em
• Acuvibe Mini by Dangerous Lilly
• We-Vibe by Domina Doll on Viviane’s Sex Carnival
• Mia by LELO by That Toy Chick
• The Ophoria Bliss No. 12 by Kyle of Butchtastic

Dildos

• Phallix 24-Karat Gold Double Happiness by Adriana
• Mr. Squiggly by Hot Movies For Her Sex Toy Crew
• Red Pleasure Wand by Scarlet Lotus Sexgeek
• Alumina Revolve by Sinclair Sexsmith
• Cherries Jubilee Glass Dildo by Dangerous Lilly
• Silk Lover by Monkey

Anal Toys

• My Pleasure: Pleasure Plug 2 by Ansley Agnello

Toys for Boys

Bo! Selector: LELO Bo by hedonisticbitch

Sex Kits

• The Lovers Paintbox by Essin’ Em

Lube/Massage Oil

• Orgazyme by Lucy Vonne
• Three Lube Review by Domina Doll
• O’My O Clitoral Stimulating Pleasure Gel by Domina Doll

BDSM/Fetish

• Super Strap Super Sheet by Alpine Subdreams
• Three Restraints and a Blindfold by Scarlet Lotus Sexgeek
• Black Leather Blindfold by Ansley Agnello
• With Bells On- Spartacus Clit Clamp by Betty Rocket
• The Red Menace on Handcuffs by hedonisticbitch

Erotic Books/Games

• Never Have the Same Sex Twice by Sexorcism
• Frenzy by Sexorcism

Adult Movies/Porn

• Jenna Loves Pain by Alpine Subdreams
• Champion by Ansley Agnello
• First Dates by J.D. Bauchery
• Thickalicious by The Porn Librarian
• Rendezvous at the Golden Gate Bed & Breakfast by J.D. Bauchery
• The Fashionistas by Domina Doll on Viviane’s Sex Carnival
• Man’s Ruin by Winkytiki by Domina Doll

Miscellaneous

• Fly Me to the Moon – LELO Luna Beads by Thursday’s Child
• Happy Hearts Massager by Bad Bad Girl
• Luna Pleasure Bead System by Adriana
• Fantasy Glide by Bad Bad Girl
• The Female Condom by Shasta Gibson
• Foot Long Toy Case from FYN by Domina Doll

As we all know, I have a leopard print fetish. Love sac, photo albums, sheets, negligees, pillows, purse, gloves – you name it, I probably have it in leopard print.  Ergo, when a certain sex toy company happened to start carrying the Liberator Ramp in LEOPARD PRINT, you can imagine the cravings I felt. Luckily, they decided to reward me (and wish me a happy birthday), and guess what arrived on my doorstep?  Yeah, you got it!

So, I’ve never had a piece of sex toy furniture that was made specifically for sex. I mean, sure, I’ve re-commissioned pillows into wedges, I’ve used counters and couches.  I even have an amazing Fascinator Throe that keeps my bed from getting wet/lubey/waxy/etc.  But no “real” furniture.

Ergo, I was incredibly excited to give this a try. Even better, it showed up on my doorstep on my actual birthday…

I was demonstrating all the positions you could do with it.  You can put it at the end of the bed, be bent over and fucked from behind.  You can do doggy style on the bed. You can lean someone up against it, bending your legs until you’re half a pretzel, and get fucked.  You can lean down over it it, resting your head on the bed quite comfortable, giving you ideal g-spot or p-spot access.  This is bloody brilliant.

However, I have to say that I think the most brilliant use for it is for oral sex on on a woman…I’m not sure how this works for sucking cock (of any variety), but if you’re going down on a woman, and have her lie back, scootching her butt to the edge of the ramp – and BAM! Perfect position to eat some cunt.  You don’t have to have the same kind of neck cramps, and you have so much more easy access.  Freaking genius.  And as the woman on the receiving end, it feels AMAZING.

The soft, microsuede cover feels soft and gentle against your skin – no chance of rug burn here.  Better yet, you can unzip it, and it is machine washable, so you can share the ramp with partners, use lubes without fear of it getting gross after time, etc.  Moreover, there is an awesome cover to put on it when it’s not in use, so you don’t need to worry about it getting dusty.

Only problem I had with this miraculous ramp was the storage issue – it’s fairly sizeable, and while it kinda sorta fits on the top shelf of my closest, it’s certainly not the best solution. I’ve contemplated leaving it out in my living room with the rest of my leopard print items, but I can’t really find a place for it. If you’re living in a one bedroom apartment like me, I would think about where you might put it before you get it.  

Otherwise, this is probably one of my favorite, and most useful sexuality items I’ve had the pleasure of review.  Also, you can use it for other things, like stretching, fancy yoga poses, or as a back pillow for reading in bed. Lots of uses, lots of fun, and I bet you now want your very own Liberator Ramp (and don’t worry – it comes in other colors than leopard print.

-Essin’ Em

So I got this new super part time job doing promotional marketing. Like 3-5 hours a week. But it’s something, right?

Anyways, on the first day, I was partnered with a gay guy.  Haha. Funny.  Put the two queers in a punk rock filled dive bar (actually, it was a bar I love – Friday nights they spin nothing but 80s!) trying to give away, via raffle, a bunch of snowboarding stuff. I think we had like 5 people enter. Regardless, we were joking about how funny it was that the only two out people on the promotional team were put together.

My boss stopped by to see how things were going, and I pointed this out to her. She looked at me.

“Really? You’re a lesbian (I decided not to explain the whole ‘No, I’m QUEER’ thing to her at this point in time)? I would never have guessed. I mean, you don’t LOOK gay.”

I turned to my gay partner. “Really? I mean, you knew, right?”

He looked me up and down. “I mean, not really. She’s right. You don’t really LOOK gay.”

I sighed.

It’s not the first. Or second. Or even hundredth time this has happened.  Apparently, I missed the memo on what gay people are SUPPOSED to look like.

Like last month, I was on a rooftop bar (yes, Denver has rooftop bars open, even in the snow. We’re hardcore) celebrating a friend’s birthday. I met a group of queer women, and gravitated towards them. One was talking about how frustrating it was that no one read her as a lesbian. I told her that I had (obviously), and then another girl in the group turned towards me.

“You’re a lesbian? I mean, you don’t really look it.  If I saw you in a bar, I’d definitely think straight girl with alternative style.”

Gah. Damn it. What the fuck is “lesbian style??” I am not double popping my collars, getting an asymmetrical hair cut, tattoos on my arms, etc. I don’t wear button downs, ties and fedoras out. I was not born of the jean skirt and boots revolution. I like Butch style…when the person about to kiss/fuck/chat with me is wearing it, but not on me.  Why the hell should I have to change my style in order for me to “look gay??”

Fuck that.

I am a Femme that rarely wears lipstick or heels. I wear what I want to wear, what I feel comfortable and hot in, what fits me and my personality. I will not cave. I may not “look gay” to apparently either gay or straight people, but I am comfortable in both my style and my sexuality, and see no reason to change for others.

Every now and then, I begin to get fed up.  I begin to wonder if I should. And then I am reassured. Last Spring, I was panicking about this, and Sinclair told me that any Butch would obviously know I was a feisty Femme. In my recent panic, I was thinking about trying to fit in more. Then a cute dyke in my Strap-On 101 class and I were chatting, and I said something about color-coordinating my sex toys (which I DO do), and she looked and me and said “god, you’re SUCH a Femme!”  One little sentence, and it was so nice to hear.  I was seen as my identity. It didn’t matter that I was wearing pants and a button down shirt (albeit, a polka dot button down) – she saw that little Femme spark in me.

So I ask you, please don’t ever tell people things like “you don’t look gay” or “you don’t look disabled.”  Unless you know a person, and are close, and are joking with them, these are things that aren’t ok.  I mean, if I’m rocking my polka dot crutches, and am worried about some where we’re going, and my friend says “what? you’re handicapped? I never would have guessed,” it’s one thing. Or if my friend is wearing a giant rainbow feather boa, and I tell her that she just doesn’t look queer enough, that’s something different. But to tell someone that they don’t fit into part of their identities because of how they look?  That’s just silly.

That’s all I have to say on this for now.

-Essin’ Em

I am in a new e-book, along with a huge number of other amazing and sexy sex bloggers (many of us, myself included, writing under our real names!).  Do you remember when I wrote Submit, after K and I played in NYC…at the Submit party?  Well, I tweaked it a bit, and it, along with tons of other hot and sexy stories, is now available for your reading pleasure :) So check out Ravenous Romance, and get your very own copy of The Lust Chronicles!

-Essin’ Em

Editor Rachel Kramer Bussel says: The Lust Chronicles is my first foray into e-books, from the newly launched Ravenous Romance. I have NO clue how it’s gonna go, but I hope people buy it because these true sex stories are excellent, and the lineup includes many people I found via blogs and Twitter. Unlike my other anthologies, this one only costs $4.99! Woo-hoo! You can even buy it as an audiobook (for $12.99).

Here’s the Table of Contents:

Lust Chronicles Edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel

Introduction – Truth is Sexier Than Fiction

Solo Sex – A Personal History by Zille Defeu

Luke Lushious by Lolita Wolf

Five’s Company by Mal Ross

Straight Seduced by Siren

First-Time Mistress by Rachel Kramer Bussel

Fedora by Jincey Lumpkin

Fairy Tale by Mia

Day at St. John’s by Heidi Champa

I Remember a Night at a Renaissance Faire by Sara Eileen

The Anticipation of Joy by Max Lagos

Flogger by Alysa Adams

Room 3025 by Maria M. Diaz

Three’s Company For Two, Please by Val Strange

Letting Off Steam by Graydancer

Digital Manipulation by Alessia Brio

Sex in Dirty Places by Twanna A. Hines

The Consequences of Complaint by Alex M. Quinlan

Slow Dance by NookieNotes

Rocked Deep by Zaedryn Meade

Mile High Club by Devan Sagliani

Submit by Shanna Katz

Daredevil by Desiree

Kiss My Boots by Mollena “Mo” Williams

Notes on a Night in Bed by Jenna B.

Older Woman Appreciation by Mark Farley

Publisher Blurb:

The Lust Chronicles takes readers inside the minds of men and women who know how to get their kink on. Fantasies are fulfilled as they go to orgies, join the Mile High Club, seduce sexy strangers and do all the naughty things they’ve always wanted to try. In “Luke Lushious,” Lolita Wolf attends a summer sex camp and finds the man of her dirtiest dreams, while Alex M. Quinlan learns “The Consequences of Complaint.”

Here you’ll find an ode to older women, lust for a girl in a fedora, one woman’s love affair with public sex, and several passionate paeans to the lovers you just can’t forget. Readers will identify with their cravings for over-the-top sex, and get off along with the narrators as they recount every last intimate detail. Proving that truth is far hotter than fiction, the Lust Chronicles authors bare all, letting you live vicariously through their steamy, 100% true stories.

HNT this week is not about a picture.  Instead, it is about choosing three bloggers (to whom you’re not already gifting something), and tell them what you would virtually gift them for the Non-Denominational Holiday Season of Joy and Giving.  So, without any further ado:

Always Aroused Girl – Merry Christmas.  To you, I gift you the $1200 you are owed, plus extra money for all of the drama and emotional distress you have gone through.  Let’s just make it an even $5000.  I also wish you never ending, full coverage health insurance for you and your family, a steady income, and the easiest teenage-hood ever for your daughter, in order to drive you insane as little as possible.

Sinclair Sexsmith – Happy Holidays! For you, I wish you the most perfect Femme ever. Curves in all the right places, legs for days. She always wears the perfect strappy shoes, lipstick done perfectly.  When you slide into her, she makes all the right noises, and moves with you perfectly.  Out and about, she never leaves your arm, just drawing people towards you. I wish her there for you whenever you want her, whenever you need her. I also wish for marriage to be legalized for all, and for you to be able to be married in the sharpest of tuxes to this hottest of femmes.

Curvaceous Dee – You’re amazing. For you, I wish you a few things. First, a cure for your brother, or at least something to add many many more comfortable years to his life. Then, I wish you a fuck ton of money, so that you, your brother, Apollo, and the rest of your amazing horde of orgasmic partners can take a cruise around the world, relaxing and getting sexed up.  Lastly, I wish you a plane ticket to Colorado to come and visit me!

This is not solely an HNT thing.  Please, pass it on. Pay it forward.  We are such a wonderful and loving community.  Choose one, or three, or ten sex bloggers. Share your wishes and virtual gifts with them. It’s free. It’s fun. And people love to feel loved. I know I do.  So share the spirit.

And for those of you who celebrate Christmas, Happy/Merry Christmas!

-Essin’ Em

Highs of this very second:

*A fun night with L at karaoke and a friend’s party

*200,000 hits on my blog since I started counting summer 2007

*Getting my Femme Spiral tattoo today

*5 more days of fried food!

Lows:

*Having to decided that I can’t afford Celebrex for my arthritis ($114/mth…percocet, on the other hand, while more addictive, is only $5.65 for 40 pills).

*Realizing I cannot afford allergy medication anymore

*Being rejected by 6 insurance companies

*Having my knee doctor tell me I’m a “rare oddity” with very few choices left (and the only feasible one involves an MRI I’d have to pay for out of pocket)…and when I asked him what other people my age do when they have knees like mine, he told me he has never met anyone with knees like mine

*Curling up in bed alone, when all I want in the world this very second is to be the little spoon with someone’s arms around me

*Wish I lived someone else’s life