Sexuality Happens

2008 has not been the best year for me.  I’ve spent almost 5 months (on and off) with out a full time job.  I’ve been without insurance since I moved to Colorado. My grandmother died. I was in a bad car crash on the way to her funeral.  I severely injured my ankle, and went deep into debt to fix it.  My baby (kitty) Athena passed away. I was in another car accident. I finishd grad school, going further into debt to do so.  I can’t get a job, and keep getting told that I’m over qualified because of my Master’s. I took it off my resume. My knees have gotten infinitely worse, especially in the last six-eight months. I can’t afford my celebrex, my allergy meds, or some of my migraine meds.

However, there have been some good things too. I’ve met some amazing people via the blogosphere (even some in real life like Miss Avarice, AAG, Sinclair, Urban Gypsy, and more).

I moved back to Colorado…which while the move heavily depleted my bank account, and I got hurt, and have no job, there is no where else this second where I would rather be.  My best friend here (and my one from Seattle who visits her family here) make up for almost everything.  My new friends. My old friends I’ve rekindled. My crushes, most of which have become friends. The Denver Roller Dolls.  The weather where it’ll be 70 degrees in November, snow one day in December, and be sunny and melted the next day, where the cold doesn’t go through to your bones, and where you can pretty much wear a hoodie and flip flops year round.  The people who stop to ask you if you are ok if you’re sad or look lost, who (for the most part) don’t cut you off, and where neighbors actually want to meet you, and help you out.  Where you almost NEVER hear anyone honk.  Where you can parallel park without bumping bumpers, and you don’t pay $24 for a few hours of parking. Where GOOD Mexican food can be had upon demand, all the time. Yes, I am glad to be back in Colorado.

J and I broke up in 2007, but the drama and hurt continued on into spring and summer 2008. He’d hurt me, I’d forgive him, we’d be friends. I let it happen again and again.  Finally, I gave up, and deleted him out of my phone. I emailed him when Athena died, but that’s been it.  I met K — one of the most interesting and amazing people I know. As I’ve been cleaning up my house, I put up this cool photo collage thing on my wall. And now he stares at me from above the TV, blue eyes piercing me, flipping me off.  He is a solid friend, someone to play with, someone to bitch about work with, someone who has been there for me during some of the harder parts of this year. I really appreciate him, and hope he’ll come visit next summer for Thunder.

And then there is F.  We drive each other crazy…both in the good way and the bad way. We love each other very much, and frustrate each other very much.  Regardless, I am glad that she came back into my life. So glad.  And did I mention we’re shooting for Crash Pad Series and NoFauxxx.com this January? Please remember to check us out! Also, if we can find a working video camera, we’ll be doing a video for GoodDykePorn too. We’re crazy. I know. But when we’re on, we’re on. And the sex is amazing.  And for now, that is enough for me.

I’ve been selected by Rachel Kramer Bussel and Ravenous Romance to have two of my stories published in their e-books. Look for my work in The Lust Chronicles and Sex and Music.

Hysteria Boutique, the local sex-positive, queer inclusive sex toy store has been kind enough to have me as a resident workshop presented and educator, and I’ve been teaching some really fun and fabulous classes there.  I love teaching/educating, so I’ve really enjoyed that.

I’ve done some really cool and fun photoshoots (as you’ve seen from some of the photos I’ve posted on here), and hope to do more. Maymay, AAG, Mr. Coypink and Sinclair have helped me move my site, get it hosted, and make it pretty. I’ve become a twitter-aholic. I have some new porn star crushes; Jiz Lee, Madison Young, IAmFiveStar. I made lots of new sex blog friends…and a few non-blogger friend who commented, and I then met in the real world…including a friend I used to figure skate with. 

Did I mention I finished my Master’s degree? I mean, I can’t find anyone that wants to use it right now, but that’s a big accomplishment, damn it.

Parts of 2008 have seemed like a year of hell for me…but there have certainly been some positives too.  It will be interesting to see what comes next…

-Essin’ Em