Can You Slam It In A Drawer?
Recently, I’ve found myself hanging out with some very interesting people from a local dungeon. Amazing people, intriguing conversation and interactions, and the person who seems to be the matriarch of the group is down right inspiring. Moreover, she puts things in an excellent perspective.
As a queer woman, I’m always getting those guys telling me that all I need to do is have sex with them, and voila, I’ll never turn back, that they’re the guy to “fix me,” that I’m a dyke because I haven’t had the right man yet. One of my favorite lines is, when I ask why they think they’re going to fuck me better than a woman, is “well, honey, I’ve got a cock.”
That’s when I reply “well, I’ve got about ten, so I can choose.”
Often, I’ll get “well, mine is different,” or the lovely “yeah, well, I’m hung like a horse.”
Answer? “I can be if I want to as well. In a variety of colors and designs.”
But this woman, the matriarch of this group, put it all in fabulous perspective.
“Can you slam it in a drawer, and walk away?”
This line may be one of the best “bugger off and stop trying to straight-en me out when I’m as queer as a four dollar bill” lines I’ve ever heard.
And for that, I bow to her.
-Essin’ Em
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Classic. Truly classic.
that is indeed one fantastic, well thought out, brilliant comeback lines I’ve ever heard. I don’t get it. I happen to be bi. But I don’t go around telling folks all you need is to get me and my female friend in bed for a roll in the hay and you’ll never go back. I am not sure what the stupidity is that grips some guys to try and “convince” you by having sex that you aren’t what you are! Instead that should be honored, respected and embraced.
I just don’t grok those guys!
Jerry
who wonders if he tries to bat left in baseball if he’ll stay that way and never come back to being a right handed hitter.
I also like that it subtly brings up the point that you happen to prefer women, not inspite of, but because of their bodies that can unattach from said members and “slam it in a drawer & walk away” w/o skipping a beat.
Three cheers for fantastic comebacks!
Hey, I did that once! Although walking may be a bit of an overstatement for the motion afterwards…
Excellent!
Any man who seriously thinks he has what it takes to “turn a woman straight” doesn’t. Because that attitude proves his head (either one) is in the wrong place. Men like that also probably think that seeing another man’s penis will turn them gay. Whatever.
oh, that is fantastic.
i always like asking if they’ve ever fucked a guy. “Oh! Well, then how do you know you’re not gay? I mean, maybe you just haven’t had the right man (or cock) yet.”
I despise that line of questioning. It’s totally insulting and presumptious.
And I second lady brett’s answer. How DO they know they’re not gay? Are they SURE they just haven’t fucked the right man, yet?
Alternatively, if they say “well I’ve got a cock”… Shrug nonchalantly and reply “Yeah, but mine’s bigger.”
Men have SUCH penis issues.