Sexuality Happens

Courtesy of my Moose.

Yesterday I went down to the free STD clinic at Denver Health (not only do they provide free STD testing to the community, but also free or cheap pap’s, pelvic exams, and family planning consultations if you meet certain criteria) for a check up and a consult for birth control. I’ve been wanting to switch up my methods and try the hormone based ones again. I had bad experiences with them back in LA. The pill not only killed my pms but also all my emotions in general, I lost my libido and experienced drastic vaginal dryness compared to what I’m usually like (prior to being on the pill I have never needed lube.. it was actually an insult the first time my partner at the time suggested we break it out one night). My doctor told me it’s a rare reaction that some women have to the hormones.. tried SEVERAL different combos and mixes.. nothing worked so I went off the pill.

When I was last into the Clinic for my semi-annual STD screenings the nurse had mentioned that they’ve got a few with different hormones and delivery systems that might work for me, most notably the ring. She said that since the ring administers the hormones locally, there is less that gets processed by my body so the side effects might be more minimal than I had experienced prior. Figured I’d give it a shot, at least make an appointment to go in and talk to someone about things and my situation.

I love going down to the STD clinic. Since it’s free, they ask ya all sorts of probing questions regarding your sexual history and activity to garner statistics. I swear, they never seem to expect to hear the things that come out of my mouth.

Nurse: “have you ever tried cocaine?”
Me: “I’ve been told I have…”
Nurse: “um.. now how does that work??”

Nurse: “Now this is a sample of the size of the NuvaRing it flexes enough to fit comfortably inside…”
Me: “Wow, interesting. Because it’s bigger than even some of the cock rings I’ve seen”
Nurse: ~look of shock~

But ya, I ended up being the one surprised when we started talking about IUDs. Last visit, they told me around December to come back for more info on LOW COST IUDs. So it was definitely a shock when she asked me if I was interested in being screened for eligibility and when I told her I wasn’t sure I had the $50 on me was when she informed me that they had ultimately made the decision to provide them FREE of charge as long as people qualified.

Essentially, I love the way they are running their program and am extremely impressed. Not only is it FREE, but also their regulations on who is eligible are flexible. It didn’t matter that I’m a 22 year old who had never had a child and openly admits to having multiple partners as well as a few other things (trying to respect the privacy of my partners). Usually, the fact that I’m so young and have never had a child would make most general practitioners think twice before sticking an IUD in me. Let alone the multiple partners thing. IUDs have strings attached to them that hang down from your uterus into your vaginal canal. They’re handy for checking monthly that the thing is still there. What this means though, any STI that you might contract travels quickly to your uterus. There is an increased risk for PID and other serious issues with the IUD. This means, if you have multiple partners (as I do) you need to be on the game in regards to open communication about testing and their sexual practices with their partners. My primary sexual partner and I are so open that I don’t worry, I know everyone he is with, what they do, how often they do it and vice a verse. It enables me to securely say, we do our best to inhibit the contraction of an STI into the relationship. Because of this fact, which the nurse talked with me on extensively yesterday, she said she had no worries that I’d be on my game in this regard. Again- AWESOME. I think it’s great that they can put the burden on the patient because ultimately, if I am responsible enough to maintain healthy relations with multiple partners, why should I be considered ineligible.

Anywho, for those interested, definitely go take advantage! Don’t know how long they’ll keep it free.. they’re definitely not advertising it.

Oh! And if you didn’t know already the Denver Public Health’s Free STD Clinic also offers 3 months of birth control of your choice (the ring, pills, the patch, etc) with a referral for more after 3 months. All medication for STI’s (they’ll even do a screening for UTIs!!) are free as well. TONS of resources there, free condoms (yay for the fishbowl on the counter!) and the entire staff is GREAT! If you go in I recommend getting an appointment with Lynn or Erica (they’re my favorites) and say, “HI!” to the drug and alcohol counselor for me! She’s a riot.

Just don’t be like me and offer yourself up for another HIV test when you just had one 3 months prior and haven’t been exposed just because you want to be poked with a needle. They look at you funny.

Meet the Thigh Harness. Yes. It’s a harness. For a dildo.

It is not a sexy looking sex toy. Not at all. In fact, I’m reminded of many of the “oh so sexy” (translation; not sexy at all) knee braces I’ve worn throughout my almost ten years of knee problems. The neoprene, the velcro…not exactly what you think of when you think of hot, sexy, fucking.

It gets better.  I attached the harness, having put in the dildo.

Q and I decided to use the Purr Dildo with this harness, as it’s one of her favs, it vibrates, and it’s a great length for trying out in a harness.

As I moved around the room, desperately searching for the lube (my bedroom looks like a sexual fallout zone right now), the vibe kept turning on. I’d turn it off, then move, and it would turn on again. Not sexy, and fairly annoying.  I kept adjusting the thigh harness to the right thing, and was getting ready for some epic fail.

Well, I’ll admit when I’m wrong. I was wrong. This is one of my favorite new sex toys, ever. For less than $20.

Q and I lubed up, and I slid into her, as she leaned forward to kiss me. As I fucked her with my leg, I played with her nipples, kissed her, pulled her hair, ran my nails over her back, and more.  I barely even had to move my leg before Q would make a gasp or a moan. It was amazing, being able to be so close to her while fucking her, and having access to so much.

Then I made her get on her knees, fingers linked behind her neck. I had her bouncing up and down on me, as I pulled and twisted her nipples, slapped her face, put my hand around her neck, and more.

You can fuck on your side.  You can fuck sitting up. Standing up. In a chair, having someone ride you. It’s brilliant, because even if you don’t have knee access/usage, or even much muscle control, you can easily have someone ride you, or find a position that works for you. Very disability friendly.

And if you judge by how fucking soaking wet this harness is from Q whenever we play with it, I think it can definitely be considered a raging success. Good thing it’s made of neoprene, and can be easily cleaned!

Want you very own thigh harness? Head on over to VibeReview!

-Essin’ Em

In case you were ever wondering what it might look like if you were to give me a spanking. Or to fuck me really hard from behind…

This is the view you’d have.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday!

-Essin’ Em

by Massimo Innocenti

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #35? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #37? Submit it here before Sunday July 12th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Birthday Giveaway! Deadline: Monday July 13th at noon Pacific Time.
• Hello Kitty Vibe photo contest Deadline: September 1, 2009.

Madame Editrix

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

• Striptease Kit by Kara Sutra

Vibrators

• Studded Tongue Twister by The Duchess
• AcuVibe Mini by Beautiful Dreamer
• Lovemoiselle Cecile by CarrieAnn
• LELO Iris by Thursday’s Child
• Remote Vibrating Thong by The Duchess
• Fun Factory Gallant by CarrieAnn
• AcuVibe Mini by Miss Mia
• Hello Kitty Vibe by Athena Bradford
• Orion Bottle Rocket by Dangerous Lilly
• LELO Iris by Essin’ Em
• Earth Angel by Carnivalesq
• LELO Gigi and Iris by HavingMyCake
• Slicone Intimate Diver by Adriana
• Lovemoiselle Cecile by Exploring Intimacy

Dildos

• Randy by Sinclair Sexsmith
• Lovemoiselle Noemie by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Savanna’s Spiral Wrapped G-spot Wonder by Amorous Rocker
• Glo Smooth by Baby Sinead

Anal Toys

• Tantus Ryder by Sexorcism
• Tantus A-Bomb by Scott
• Romp by Epiphora
• Alumina Pace by Epiphora

Toys for Cocks

• Tenga Deep Throat Cup by Baby Sinead
• Zeus Vibrating Cockring by True Pleasures
• Hannah Harper Authentic Love Doll by Red

BDSM/Fetish

• 36 Inch Spreader Bar by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
• Sport Cuffs by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Rubber Ball Gag by Domina Doll

Adult Books/Games

• Opening Up by Essin’ Em

Adult Movies/Porn

• Fuck Me in the Bathroom #3 by Beautiful Dreamer
• Sugar High Glitter City by Nadia West
• The Art of Sex by J.D. Bauchery
• Rivals Volume 2 by The Porn Librarian
• Peters by FrzKey
• Not Bewitched XXX by J.D. Bauchery
• In Praise of Indecency by The Porn Librarian
• Butch Boi Lansing Raw by J.D. Bauchery
• Afrodite Superstar by Thursday’s Child
• Nina Hartley Private Sessions #11 by Lady Wolfdreams

Lingerie

• Cocktail Party Collar and Cuffs by Red

Storage

• Just in Case Condom Compact II by Wilhelmina Wang
• For Your Nymphomation Bigfoot Case by Red

Sex Furniture

• Liberator Fascinator Throe – Microfiber by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
• Liberator Wedge & Ramp Combo by Sarah Estrella
• Liberator Black Label Scoop by Thursday’s Child
• Liberator Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combo by Dangerous Lilly
• Sexercise Me System by Red

Miscellaneous

• La Femme by Sleeping Dreamer

I have a lot of fantasies.  I’ve been lucky enough to have many of them fulfilled over time.

Sex in the parking lot.

Sex with one of my biggest crushes.

Sex in a restaurant.

Sex until I couldn’t take it anymore.

But as I get more and more experience, I have less and less easily fulfillable fantasies. I mean, do you know how freaking hard it is to get a queer gang bang organize? Or how expensive violet wands are?

Luckily, I have an oh so willing and hot and dear god she’s good in bed partner, and she’s made two of my older fantasies come to life, both with in the last week.

First, we had sex in a hot tub.  Many of you may know I LOVE hot tubs, and have masturbated and orgasmed in hot tubs ‘cross the country. I’ve made out with a few people in hot tubs, including F and Q.  However, I’ve never *had sex* in one.  And last week, she fucked me so god damn well in the tub, carefully avoiding the video cameras and guy working out in the other area.  And I was good, and quiet and came really hard.

Then two nights ago, she fucked me ridiculously well on my balcony.  I have this amazing balcony, and while a few people have let me make out with them, or even grope them, on my balcony, no one has let me fuck them, or has fucked me.  And not only did Q fuck me on my balcony, but she made it a whole scene, that involved toys. I’m probably going to write this one up, so check back.

Anyways, nothing too long and drawn out about this. I just wanted to share with the world (or at least my readers) at large, that my wonderful partner Q has done an excellent job of not only fulfilling two of my fantasies recently, but also in doing things with me I’ve never done before…and THAT is always new, fun and impressive!

-Essin’ Em

Then you shouldn’t be having it.

The other day, Q and I were sexing it up, just like we do. She said something incredibly amusing (that I’m apparently not allowed to share on here, sorry), and we were laughing. A lot. Really hard. Like deep belly laughs.  And suddenly, the Echo dildo, which hither to this point was in her cunt, went flying. Out of her cunt, at me. Cue more laughing. And then I kept trying to push it back into her, and bam! More projectile dildo.

The next day, she told me that when I played with her nipples, it was like “boom boom pow.” Yes. She really said that. I almost died laughing. And might have called red.

Then I was cuddling with her, and tried to switch positions, and although my eyes were closed, her nipple essentially ended up in my eye socket, therefore preventing me from opening my eye sockets, unless of course I wanted a nipple in my eyeball.

There have been times I’ve almost fallen out of bed, mid-sex, because I’m laughing so bloody hard. And you know what, it’s one of my favorite things about Q, that we CAN laugh in the middle of sex, that when something IS funny (like projectile dildos), it’s ok to pause, laugh a shit ton, and then get right back to it.  I didn’t realize exactly how important so much laughter was until I felt comfortable to laugh so much with my partner.

Laughs and sex fail for the win!

Here is a letter reposted from the lovely Wendy Blackheart. I’m so incredibly excited about this project and hope that many of you choose to participate.

-Essin’ Em

Hello my wonderful friends!

Ok. I’m starting a new project, and I need you’re help. You being, uh, everyone I’ve sent an email to in the past year who might be interested in this project. If this isn’t welcome, I am sorry.

I’m creating a site called Vaginal Revolution, which will soon be located at showmeyourcunt.wordpress.com. (its not quite operational yet. There isn’t anything there) See, I just caught part of a documentary on the BBC about women having vaginal surgery, particularly to reduce the size of their labias. It seems to grow out of a discomfort with what they think of as abnormal anatomy – because they don’t know what vaginas can look like. 

Please send all photos, comments, all that good stuff to VaginalRevolution@gmail.com. I’d like to keep my regular email from overflowing with vag and make sure I don’t miss anything! :)

If you’re not into showing off your bits on the internet, (and even if you are) please please reblog my request for photos! Send it far and wide! (though I’d hold off on putting up the link to the site until there is a bit more there. Right now, I don’t even have a photo of my cunt yet!)

Photo by Michael Barone

Happy 4th of July. Happy “Independence Day.”

Enjoy your BBQs, your cold beers.

Remember for a moment all of our friends and family serving our country, fighting to uphold wars that should never have happened, and to help create independence for those who do not yet have it.

Remember for a moment those in this country who are not independent, whose freedom and rights are not equal.

Those who can not marry. Those who cannot adopt. Those who cannot visit their loved ones in the hospital. Those who do not have insurance. Those who live in tent cities. Those who don’t know when their next meal is.

I am not saying don’t celebrate. I’m not saying to not be patriotic.

But please think. Think about what you ARE celebrating. Think about our country’s bloody history. Think about who and what we’re fighting for, and what we aren’t fighting for.

Be careful. Please choose not to drink and drive (or drink and boat). If you’re lighting fireworks, don’t blow yourself up (and if you live in a place where they’re illegal, please don’t light them and cause fires, kthnxby).

Celebrate.

But also pause and think about what this celebration means.

Happy Fourth of July!

-Essin’ Em

I am so close to owning a monopoly of Lelo toys. I mean, seriously.  Well, I don’t really have use personally for the cock ring or butt plug…but otherwise, I’m close.  I have the Liv, the Gigi (top 3 vibes list!), the Lily, the Mia, the Ella, and now…I have the Iris!

I think all I need now is the Nea, the Luna Balls and the Elise (I’m ok not owning solid gold sex toys), and ka-pow!  I win (not sure what, but something!).  Hint hint, nudge nudge.

But I wanted the Iris for more than just my pursuit of the Lelo monopoly. I wanted it because I love love love the Gigi vibe (brilliant shape, re-chargeable like all Lelo toys, lots of vibration options, etc), but it’s a little skinny.  I mean, you’re talking to the girl who likes large amounts of fingers, if not a whole hand, in her cunt.  I wanted something a little bigger, a little heartier, but still with the brilliance of the the Lelo products; environmentally friendly, vibration options, etc.

I found what I was looking for in the Iris.  It IS bigger (wider AND longer than the Gigi), and while it’s not the same shape, it still performs splendidly on the G-spot. Actually, this toy is great both insertably, AND as just a clitoral stimulator. Ok, I lied – “just” doesn’t cover it. It’s a MAGNIFICENT clitoral stimulator.

First, I used it on Q. I fucked her with it while I licked her, and while I used another vibrator on her clit. I fucked her with it while I used my fingers on her clit.  I just plain fucked her with it.  I fucked her with my fingers while I held the Iris on her clit. I put her through the paces of the Iris, let me tell you. And she loves them all.

Correction; like me, she found a few of the settings annoying…they’re good teasing settings though. I love playing with orgasm control, so some of the on/off/on/off settings are really fun and frustrating for her.  However, she loved the two solid settings (they vibrate in two different areas of the vibrator). Both of us like that not only are their different types of vibrations, but also there is the ability to change the different levels on each type.

I felt very similarly, and would rank this baby right alongside my Gigi. Just the same power, material, charging, etc…just a different shape, and a more exciting (for me!) size.  Two thumbs up, and a full FIVE STARS!

Want your own Iris?  You can get it here!

-Essin’ Em

I love this picture.  Not because how I look. I’m kind of meh in this photo.

But I love my hand, and Q’s hand. Together. Just chilling, resting upon each other.

I love her. And it’s easy to do. I never feel forced to tell her, I never feel or love is forced. It’s just comfortable and it works.

Also, Q’s cat is on the table.  I love him. Not quite as much as I love Kinsey or Kali, but I definitely have a big spot in my heart for him.

So yeah. This is why I love this photo.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday!

-Essin’ Em