Sexuality Happens

I can’t remember I time when I didn’t want a Feeldoe…and once they came out with a BLACK feeldoe (the feeldoe stout), I wanted one SOOOO bad. It was big, in my colors (black/red) and I wanted one.  Lucky for me, Vibe Review was kind enough to send me one.

Now, I’ve also been fortunate enough to try the Share (by Fun Factory), which has really grown on me, and the Nexus Sr, by Vixen Creations, which I’m ambivalent about.

The Feeldoe comes in 3 different sizes; slim, regular, and stout…and of course, these sizes are color coded.  I like bigger things in my cunt, and I like black best (above blue and purple), so it happened to work out very well that the Stout Feeldoe (the biggest one) was the black one.

I was excited to finally try it, and brought it to Phoenix with Q for our trip.  Saturday night, we had a romantic-ish evening, hoped into bed with vampire gloves, a knife, some lube, and the Feeldoe. I was ready.

Until we tried it out. Dear god, it was epic fail.  We tried the small end in me, big end in her, me on top. Then me on bottom.  Then we reversed it, with her holding the bulb like end in her cunt, and trying to fuck me…in like 5 different positions. Negatory commander.

It would pop out. It wouldn’t go in the other way. My cunt muscles would pull it out of her. You name it, we had the problem. Plus, while the length looked fine regularly, once you realize how far it need to go, plus my (or her) stomach area, you only actually get 2-3 inches inside you. Which was not doing it for you. 

I tried holding onto it and fucking her with it, but she looked at me like I was crazy. We gave up, throwing it aside for my fingers. Later on, she did parade around the hotel room holding it as a gun and making “pew pew”and “bang bang” noise, which at the very lease did afford me some entertainment. 

I thought it might be just us, so I twittered about it. Here were my responses:

*gothicat@EssinEm it doesn’t stay in because I get too wet plus my tummy gets in the way so no not really

*cjducky@EssinEm ive read that same thing on alot of reviews.

*sexisfuncoochie@EssinEm I love mine though it does take some practice. And acceptance that it may pop out & I’ll grab it to finish the job!

*BackseatBoohoo @EssinEm Heard the same from plenty of people: good concept, but it just doesn’t work in practice.

*margaret1978@essinem I do not. It doesn’t fit me right inside and does not feel like it is secure. I never use it.

*wilhelminawang@EssinEm it’s an interesting and admirable concept… but it actually doesn’t work all that well

Basically, if you HAVE to wear it in a harness (as AAG suggested), just get a dildo you really like. Otherwise, try the Share – I LOVE it! The Feeldoe gets 2 out of 5 stars.

To get your own Feeldoe, click here. If you’re like me, and prefer the Share, click here.

-Essin’ Em