Sexuality Happens

Re-posted from Good Vibrations Magazine

If you’ve been following pretty much any conversation on sex toys, you’ve probably heard about phthalates in toys, how they can be dangerous (or at least allergy causing), and how there are all sorts of awesome and amazing materials that are in fact phthalate-free.

Good on you. You’ve chosen to take charge of this part of your sexual health and pleasure, and you’ve bought a toy made of high quality plastic, steel, aluminum, silicone, ceramic, glass, wood, marble, granite, or another phthalate free material.  It probably cost slightly more than the cheap jelly toys we have all grown accustomed to buying, but you know it’ll be worth it.

But what happens when you want to clean this toy? Or just as importantly, when you want to share it with a new partner (or multiple new partners)? Most people can’t afford to buy new toys for each new lovers, but our Health Education teachers never taught us how to clean and how to sterilize our sex toys.

Cleaning them is easy. If you’re just wanting to clean the toy for use with yourself, or a fluid bound* partner, you can wash pretty much all sex toys with water and anti-bacterial soap.  The soap part is important, even if it’s just for yourself, or with a fluid bound partner. Why? Bacteria grows in your body and its fluids, and everyone has different bacteria. You even have different bacteria day-to-day. If you have a yeast infection, and don’t properly wash your toy, you can give it to your partner, or even give it back to yourself. 

After washing them, you can either air dry them, or try them with a towel (this may leave some lint on your toy, so you might want to rinse your toys off before using them). Remember not to put your toys into closed spaces while wet, especially not ziplock bags – this can cause mold to grow, and that is just gross.

Now, if you’ve made it through kindergarten, you’ve learned that sharing is caring.  If you are caring enough to share your toys, please make sure you’ve sterilized them first for any non fluid bound partners.

How, you may ask, do you sterilize toys?  Not all toys can be sterilized.  Jelly, plastic, acrylic and stone toys can NOT be sterilized. If you choose to share them, use a condom/glove to cover them.  Wood is debatable – I personally don’t share my wood toys, because I think it’s slightly porous despite the coating, but others will disagree with me.  Silicone, steel, aluminum, glass and ceramic are 100% sterilizable.

There are three ways to sterilize your toys.  Number one; wipe them down with a 10% bleach solution (mix bleach to water 1:10), then rinse them off before drying.  This is especially great for silicone vibrators, such as the Gigi and the Lily. Number two; boil your toys in plain ol’ water for three minutes.  I particularly like this for silicone dildos, as I can boil them all at once, like a stew of pretty colored cocks. You can use this method for any non-vibrating toys, including glass. Number three; this requires having a dishwasher. If you happen to have one, you can put all your sex toys on the top shelf, and run it with no soap/detergent.  In order to not waste water, I save them all up and run them at once, often with vases, and other dusty items.

As far as storing them, it’s always good to keep them away from dust (and in my case, epic amounts of cat hair).  You can put them in plastic bags, wrap them in non-linty fabric, or even invest in a sex toy storage case.

And that, dear readers, is the best way to take care of your toys, while sharing them with those you love and/or lust after.

*Fluid Bound means having made the decision with your partner(s) that you have both/all been tested for STIs, and feel comfortable sharing fluids with each other with using barriers (condom/dam/glove). Fluid bound partners can be non-monogamous, but generally choose to use barrier methods with their other partners.

 “Sex 411: The Sex Ed You Never Learned in School” is about educating people on all types of sex and sexuality…not just preventing pregnancy and STIs. For information on discussions, workshops, sex coaching, play parties, body-healthy sex toy parties and more, please visit www.ShannaKatz.com.