Sexuality Happens

Last week was a crazy week. Follow up from my birthday, Channukah, our anniversary, getting a job (will write about it soon), etc.

Something I didn’t get to write about that I had wanted to was the International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers, which is December 17th (Q and my anniversary) every year. There are vigils, protests, conversations, panels, etc in honor of this day, and toward the goal of stopping violence against sex workers.  You can learn more at the Sex Worker Outreach Project’s website.

Why, you may ask, does this matter?

Firstly, NO ONE deserves violence against them. Period.  Not while they work, not at home, not period. Regardless of what you believe about sex workers, there should not be violence perpetrated against them.

Next, let’s look at sex workers.  What is a sex worker? It’s someone fulfilling a need, providing more of a full service customer service.  Instead of worrying about whether someone is satisfied with their filet mignon (or burger), or that blood diamond they just dropped the cost of a house on, sex workers are worrying about whether people feel cared for, whether they are getting their needs met.  Same work, just different medium.

Sex workers are porn stars, pro dommes, prostitutes, escorts, phone sex operators, sex surrogates, etc.  We are people, just like you. We work jobs in order to make money to survive. Some of us love our jobs, others don’t, just like you. We have good days, and bad days. We like some of our clients, we don’t like others, but can’t say that to their face, because they’re customers, and the customer is (almost) always right.

We are mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, feminists, those with higher education, and those with no formal education, from all types of backgrounds. We all like connecting with people in some way, shape or form. Some of us have other jobs, others don’t. Some have pets, some hate animals. Some love bacon, others of us are vegetarians. We have days where we are insecure, and days where we feel like we’re on top of the world.

You don’t always know in your life who is a sex worker.  Who knows if one of your friends or family members is a sex worker? Why not stand up to stop violence against of group of people who live amongst you. We are human, just like you.  Do we deserve violence, scorn, police raid, hatred, etc?  Not any more than any other human, not in my book.

I take a moment to think of all those sex workers who have been hurt, maimed, killed, etc. And then hope that change is made.

-Essin’ Em