Sexuality Happens

This past week, while in San Francisco, I went to the pier with the adult part of They Belong to Us. While there, we stopped at this awesome sock store, where I got ranbow socks with little cat paw prints (which I may have lost already — we’ve unpacked and I can’t find them!), rainbow knee socks, the above rainbow leg warmers, and red/black/grey argyle socks with little skulls. The latter are a bit to small for my oh-so-msucled calfs, so I have to figure that out.

Anyways, it was all rainy and drizzly on Friday, and of course I wanted to wear a skirt anyways. So, in order to keep my legs dry-ish, and add a spash of color to my ensemble, you can see the above rainbow awesome-ness that was worn with a grey skirt, purple top and snow leopard scarf.  Yeah, I’m that queer.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday!

-Essin’ Em

Note: I don’t actually have this suitcase, although I really wish I did!

This afternoon, Q and I are leaving to the wonderous city of San Francisco. I’ve only been once, and she’s never been, so it should be very excited.

I’m teach on Thursday, Friday, and most of the day Saturday. Click here to see what classes/workshops I’m doing when and where. I’d love to see you!

Additionally, I look forward to meet up with Dr. Charlie Glickman, Carol Queen, Jiz Lee, Madison Young, Ian Sparks,  Margaret and T of They Belong to Us, Mollena, and hopefully a variety of other awesome sex-positive people while in the Bay Area. I’m going to hook my essinem at gmail dot com email up to Q’s phone, and I should have wireless in the hotel, so if you don’t have my number, and would like to meet for coffee/tea/drinks/veggie friendly food, just shoot me an email or DM me on twitter with your number

Hoping for good weather, safe travel, low pain, full classes/workshops, and a great time all around.

See you on the flip side!

-Essin’ Em

This is a repost from ShannaKatz.com for the most part. For those who don’t follow me on Twitter or Facebook, I’m heading to San Francisco this week. Q will be at a higher ed conference, and I’m going to put on some classes/workshops, as well as meet up with some of my favorite sex positive people.

Hope to see you there!

-Essin’ Em

I’m heading out to one of my favorite cities this week; beautiful San Francisco. While out there, I’ll be presenting not one, not two, not even three, but four classes/workshops AND I’ll be reading erotica with the lovely Rita Seagrave and dashing Patrick Califia.

What’s the 411 on what’s going on? Well, you can always check my schedule, but I’ll break it down for you here as well.

February 25th – I’ll be at the Center for Sex and Culture talking about Relationship Mapping and Poly 101. Click here to get more info.

February 26th – I’ll be presening my famous Vaginal Fisting for One and All at the CSC. Click here to get more info.

February 27th – Today is a busy day, as I’m part of Sizzle at Femina Potens. At 2pm, I’m talking about BDSM 101 (click here for info/tickets). At 4pm, I’m presenting Sexability, about sex and dis/ability (click here for info/tickets). Then at 8pm, I’m reading erotica (click here to get info/tickets).

There you go folks; 5 opportunities to come learn, chat, grown and talk about sex with me. I’ll be available after each class/workshop to talk more one and one, and I certainly hope to see many of you (of those in the Bay Area) at one or more of these events!

Check out all this awesomeness that is happening this month (February) at the feminist/queer art gallery Femina Potens in San Francisco. It’s run by one of my favorite porn peeps, the lovely and talented Madison Young, and if you’ll note, there will be not one, but TWO classes taught by me on the 27th AND I’ll be reading some erotica that night at Sizzle.  As if that wasn’t enough, there are more exciting events going on THIS weekend, an art show this month, and a lap dance by the oh so sexy Rita Seagrave (I met her once at Thunder and almost swooned).

For more info, check out ShannaKatz.com, FeminaPotens.org or click on the flyer below for a larger image.

I’ll also be teaching at the Center for Sex and Culture on the 25th and 26th (including my infamous Vaginal Fisting for One and All class), and am hoping to meet up with some porn people, sex bloggers and more while I’m out there.

Right around this time last year, Q and I had sex for the first time, and I started bringing out the kink in her, and turning her into a fancy schmancy little pervert. Obviously, this has turned into more than friends with benefits or even casual dating, as we’ve moved together to Phoenix, live in a two bedroom condo together, and have merged our kitty families.

On that note, last week was Kali’s one year adopt-iversary.  I got my lovely girl last year right after coming home from my shoots in San Francisco for Crash Pad Series and NoFauxx.com.  I welcomed her as an older cat (she’s almost 8) into my home after mourning the loss of my love Athena. She has wormed her way into everyone’s heart (although Kinsey does still go after her occasionally), and is definitely Daddy’s little girl with Q.  It’s adorable.

I shot my first porn last January. Since then, I’ve also shot for GoodDykePorn.com and for a movie that Madison Young is doing for Good Releasing.  Obviously, I don’t have the right body type, gender presentation or sexual orientation to be a mainstream porn star, but I really do love the shoots I done.  I love that I’ve gotten to show people that there is more to porn than blondes with fake boobs faking orgasms.  I love that I’ve been part of the queer porn revolution.

I’ve gotten to present in San Francisco, Seattle, DC and Denver, and soon will do do in Phoenix.  I worked a temp contract job for the corporate world (at Western Union), and now I’m working a dream job at Fascinations.  Oh how things can change so much in a year.

Despite my tonsil surgery (have currently paid out $4500, and still have more bills coming in), new pain in my hips and worse pain in my knees and back, despite my credit cards being maxxed out, and my friends all living 700 miles away, despite my car breaking down and having no A/C (in PHOENIX), I am in such a better and happier place than I was last year.

So I acknowledge that.  Less depression (although it’s still there, and poor Q is still the recipient of random bursts of tears at time), more goodness, same amount of painkillers.  I say that’s pretty impressive given all the change and the recession.

So happy 2010 to all, albeit a bit late.  I look forward to what is coming (other than myself).

-Essin’ Em

Hello all!

What with the awesome trip to Vegas (pictures pending, although there are some awesome pictures on the Fascinations blog, courtesy of AAG), and then heading out to Denver the next day, and assuming my mother would have wireless (apparently, it went down a few months ago, and she doesn’t care to fix it), etc…I didn’t get all my planned and pre-scheduled posts up in time.  My apologies. I’ve tried over the years to be really good about always having something new up every day.

So…for today, I give to you the epicness of bridesmaid dress shopping with my BFF, and why I totally do not belong in any type of wedding store.

-Essin’ Em

Keep in mind the color for her wedding is Cornflower Blue (which Q keeps mistaking and calling Clam Chowder Blue, which amuses me to no end). However, they only have the samples for seperates in red.  With the long chiffon-y things, I totally felt like I could be a sexy brothel Madam.  My BFF did not agree.

And then I decided to play dress up a little more.

All in all, I felt fat, ugly, and disappointed at the world.  And then we went and go boba tea and I felt better.

While I’m rocking out in Vegas, I thought I’d post a few pictures from Q and my anniversary trip to Sedona, AZ.  Above is some of the beautiful red rock formations.  Here is another picture of the natural beauty:

The place we stayed was called the Lodge at Sedona, and it had its own Labyrinth (the woo-woo kind, not ala David Bowie) for walking, meditating and thinking.

And here, we have the super comfy bed in the lodge. Why yes, those red and black things at the end of the bed ARE floggers. Of course we bought quite the selection of sex toys!

And this is the beautiful statue on the porch outside the breakfast/afternoon snack room. I really liked it, Q was ambivanlent about it.

So there you have it.  Some beautiful lovey dovey romanicy woo woo pictures to enjoy while I’m rocking out in Vegas.

-Essin’ Em

Photo Credit: John Foley

What? Vagina Fisting For One and All

Where? The Denver Sanctuary

When? January 14th, 7pm-9pm

Cost? $5 per person

Who? Sex Educator and Professional Pervert Shanna Katz (aka Essin’ Em)

More info on Fetlife

Description from FetLife:

Thursday, January 14th 2010

The Denver Sanctuary kicks off the new year with a class on one of my personal favorite activities – FISTING! Vaginal fisting that is.

Presenter Essin’ Em/Shanna Katz will be in town for a few days to offer the class that she had to cancel when she moved from Denver to Phoenix.

She taught this class for a WICK’D Party one night and I had the honor of being the bottom for that class. I can honestly say first hand (or fist) that she is a fabulous presenter on this topic.

I, personally, find fisting an activity that results in the most intense experiences. I also find it often results in ejaculation from the increased stimulation. However, there is a technique to it and safety concerns that need to be addresses. Essin’ Em covers them in a manner that has everyone at ease, even laughing.

This is a class not to be missed.

I hope to see some of you there. Feel free to repost!

-Essin’ Em

Last week was my first (half) week at my new job with Fascinations (www.FunLove.com).  You can also follow us on twitter.com/fascinationsfun or facebook.com/fascinations.

It was pretty awesome…but it gets even better. I’ll be going this weekend to Las Vegas for the AVN Awards (think Oscars of porn) and the Adult Entertainment Expo. It’s always been something I wanted to go to, and this year is *the* year for it. My celeb crush/friend Jiz Lee is nominated for Best New Web Starlet, Tristan Taormino is nominated (again) as best director, and other awesome queer/feminist nominations include Dylan Ryan’s scene on CrashPadSeries.com, Babeland, Good Vibrations, NoFauxxx’s Courtney Trouble (best soundtracks), the sexy Madison Young and more. I’m so excited that queer and feminist porn/sex-positive shops are getting such great recognition!

More over, Fascinations is donating a raffle basket to Kelly Shibari’s Breasts and Bondage Fundraiser (for breast cancer), so I’m excited to be attending that.

On Friday the 8th, I’ll be attending the panel on women in adult entertainment (porn and retail) at the AEE, with many awesome feminist and queer speakers, and then hopefully seeing the awesome Jamye Waxman.

Saturday night, the sexy Always Aroused Girl will be my date to the AVN Awards. We’re both going to look sassy.

If you’re going, and have a moment to come chat with me, or want to meet up, do drinks/tea/dinner/etc, drop me a line. I’d love to see you while I’m there!

-Essin’ Em

I’m not a very spontaneous person, but last Wednesday, I did a very spontaneous thing. I book last minute stand by flights to and from New York so I could go home with Q for Christmas.

I’m Jewish. Christmas has never been a big deal to my family. Perhaps brunch at a nice hotel, or going to see an opening day movie. But then again, holidays have never really been a big deal period.  Latkes for channukah with me, my sister, my mother, and when he was alive, my father.  When I had my bat mitzvah, my uncle, aunt and two of my three cousins attended from Israel, as well as my grandfather and aunt from Florida. My sister’s bat mitvah was the same deal, although a different two cousins.  Right now, my entire family in the world is ten people; my grandfather in FL, my aunt and her partner in Fl, my uncle, aunt and three cousins in Israel, and my mother and sister in CO.  That’s it.

So coming home with Q was…interesting…to say the least. On her father’s side alone, there are 12 or 13 cousins.  Three aunts, three uncles. Grandparents. Great aunts. Grandmother in laws (what?). Dogs. Birds. Etc. We flew in and went straight to her dad’s side’s Christmas Eve dinner. There were at least 25 people at this dinner. Overwhelming to say the least…at to that they are an incredibly enmeshed Italian family on Long Island, and yeah.  A bit crazy.

Christmas day was on her mother’s side.  It was just us two, her sister, her mother, and her two aunts. Plus a visit to Nana after. Much more manageable, but still hard.  Q and two of her cousins are the only three people FROM EITHER SIDE who do not live in New York, or New Jersey. The only ones. Everyone knows everyone’s business (her great aunt on her dad’s side told me she “knew” who I was, because she’d seen me on Q’s facebook!), everyone is giving guilt trips, and mentioning events and people for which I’m completely out of the loop, and poor Q feels overwhelmed, and guilty for not coming home more often, and I feel just…so out of place. People I’ve never met are kissing me on the cheek, I’m making up back stories for what my degree is in, and we’re playing the “do they REALLY understand what it means that we’re partners” game.  Oh yes, add to all this the fact I’m a strict vegetarian (as in no chicken broth in my mashed potatoes, none the less eating little shrimps), and they had less than 24 hours of notice that I was coming.

I’m typing this on the plane on the way home (I actually was supposed to fly out Saturday night. It’s now Monday afternoon).  Everyone has been offering me Zanax (xanax?) all weekend. For anxiety, for family issues, for the high pain problems I’ve been having. Perhaps I should have taken them up on the offer. I am so glad I came – her family IS very nice (some of them actually gave me presents!) and I am in love with her Nana. What a wonderful woman.  It was good to meet all of her family, and I have a better understanding of some of her quirks now.

But I couldn’t do this on any regular basis. I’m exhausted. Q broke down in tears this morning (very rare) because she felt like she was disappointing them by not being home more often, and because she was having Catholic (oh yes, I forgot to mention that part) guilt thrown at her by all sides. I’m so glad they didn’t hate me, or so I think…but I can’t imagine doing this all the time. Q’s sister  lives 20 minutes from everyone, and I see the poor thing being pulled in so many directions, trying to please everyone. It breaks my heart.

I look forward to seeing them again in March, and Christmas next year.  But for once in my life, I’m glad to have a small family that doesn’t put a ton of importance on the holidays.  I’ve been able to get through life so far without popping Xanax and I attribute my distance from and the small size of my family for this.

Give me a day or two, and I’m sure I’ll bounce right back. Let me just say that I have a new level of respect for people in huge families, especially when they live close by.

-Essin’ Em