A few weeks ago, a new company called Virtually Adult contacted me about reviewing their new product; the Crystal Delights Butt Plugs. 

Now, as many of you know, I’m not the biggest lover of butt play.  Will I try it more in the future? Perhaps.  But is it something that really gets my engine revving? No.

However, these toys are just absolutely beautiful; 100% pure glass plugs with little jewels (available in NINE different colors) on the end. Talk about bling for your butt. How could I say no to this? Plus, so many of my readers ask me about reviewing more anal pleasure toys, because they like a little backdoor action, and would like to see reviews of toys that can help.

So I got smart. Like so many Americans, I outsourced. But instead of going out of the country, I recruited my friends to help me (there will be a silicone butt plug review coming up in the near future too!) review good quality anal products so that I can provide a greater diversity of product reviews on my site AND help out smaller, newer companies like Virtually Adult. 

Glass is a great material that can be washed or sterilized (10% bleach solution on this; I wouldn’t boil it or dishwash it because of the jewel), and can be used with either silicone or water based lube.

Therefore, without any further ado, I give you a review of the Crystal Delights Glass Butt Plug in Fuschia by M and her partner T. Thank for the help you two, and I hope y’all appreciate my new butt play reviews.

-Essin’ Em

My partner and I were both really excited to review the Crystal Delight Anal Plug by Virtually Adult thanks to Essin’ Em. The toy came in a plain black pouch, but was much prettier than the protective packaging that holds it with its jeweled, flared base, and clear glass. It looks fairly simple, yet eye catching none the less.

Photo Credit: Hawksdream

Back in Denver in January, when I was doing this shoot, I did a lot more kinky specific/dungeon photos.  But I did ask the photographer to take a few for Q, to show her that I was missing her and thinking of her during the shoot, even though I hadn’t seen her in almost a week.

She really really loves the outfit I wore on my Crash Pad Series shoot, especially the red bra. She really likes this weird cover up maxi dress think I got from Torrid on mega sale.  My homemade (in college) snow leopard and black fleece boa/scarf matches the snow leopard and black dress perfectly.  And of course, I have my glasses, which she likes a lot. The ring around my neck is one she has given me with a beautiful back story behind it, and I wear it about 90% of the time, as it feel connective to her, her strength, her passion for social justice and more.

Is it the most glamorous picture of me? Not be leaps and bounds.  It’s a bit dark, it’s an odd angle, and all of that.  But it’s full of stuff Q would like, and that was the whole point of it, so I feel I have found success. And for those of you who don’t know or care about Q and all of that, there is boobies. So enjoy.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday to everyone!

-Essin’ Em

However, two classes just failed. My BDSM 101 class failed because no one had shown up, and I’d gone through all the trouble of lugging floggers, canes, crops, knives, vampire gloves, wartenburg wheels and more from Phoenix to San Francisco, and then from the hotel to Femina Potens.  Alas, these things happen.

But what has shaken my confidence a bit, and taken a while to get over was my Relationship Mapping/Poly 101 class schedule first, on Wednesday night. 

First of all, no one showed up to open the door till 5 minutes till 6. Which really didn’t matter, since no one had shown up by then.  Finally, two people, a couple showed up. I waited a little longer to get started, and then I did. With a class of two.  One of whom told me he’d been around paint fumes all day and was in not mood to be interactive or participate.  Which was great, since this is the class where we all draw relationship maps of our own lives, and figure out what they mean, how they change over time, etc. Ok, fine.  Q was there with me, so she, and I, and the volunteer, and the woman in the couple participated. And then! My friend from Denver who is now going to school in SF showed up. Yay! Another friendly face. I continued in my talk when suddenly, 25 minutes into my presentation, the woman stood up, said “this is way too basic for us. I mean, maybe if you’d been here last year, we’d have gotten something out it, but we’re not interested.” And she and her partner walked out after taking my handouts (that I save for the end of the class).

I sat there in shock for a moment, and then, to my chagrin, I burst into tears.  Thank goodness for the volunteer, and Q, and my friend, and the next speaker, Catherine Toyooka, who all comforted me, and said that they were clearly just looking to pick up another poly couple, and that they were rude, and that some of the questions they had asked indicated they might be a bit homophobic.  None of these answers made me feel much better, but having a little group of people, only half of whom I knew, trying to comfort me, that in and of itself was comforting.

Did it shake my confidence? Oh yes.  I have NEVER had anyone walk out of a class/workshop before…regardless of whether there were 50 people or 5.  I was a little angry, because purposely put 101 in the class name, so that people who have all the basics don’t accidently show up (likely why no one came to my BDSM 101 class). But more so, I was hurt.  Was I really that bad a presenter that people couldn’t even hang on till the end of the presentation to leave? Was I so bad it was worth being rude to me?

The next day, I did my fisting demo.  I had almost 15 people, which again, while small, created an interactive and intimate audience that was wonderful. I was a little nervous and shakey to start, but I had Q and the lovely Alphafemme in the audience, and a plethora of strangers asking great questions and being really engaged. I felt revitalized and excited and so happy to be educating again.  It helped that Roxxie of Cyber-Dyke was my brilliant demo bottom.

So where do I stand now? I fly to Brown University on Sunday to present 4 classes/workshops on Monday and Tuesday.  I’m doing a cunnilingus class here in Phoenix in April. I was on Kink on Tap last weekend and felt that Sarah Sloane and I rocked the casbah. So clearly, some people/groups like me and want to hear what I have to say.

But every time I present now, I know I’ll have that tiny little worry of “what if?”  What if people walk out? What if people want to walk out but are too polite to and just sit through a horrible class? What if I can never “make it” as a sex educator?

And that, my dear readers, is my most recent story of sex educator fail.

-Essin’ Em

Carson and Shawn are some of my favorite people to watch at the Crash Pad, and this week, HotMoviesForHer has their episode up to watch, Video on Demand (so you pay per minute of what you watch). You can’t really say no to that, right? A little bit of kink and a lot of power play makes this scene one of my top 10 at CPS.

Click here to check out some free photos and/or to view the episode!

(note: I’m looking at posting some hot queer and/or sex-positive eye candy a few times a month, just to let you all know)

-Essin’ Em

(Special thanks to Matt at Fascinations for rocking out with the video stuff!)

Half of me finds it really funny. Why? Because I’d heard all of these, and had all of them done to me/used on me.  Far more often than I’d like to admit.  And I think that in many cases, humor catches people, starts conversation, etc.

The other half of me wants to find a better name for it. Because not all straight men (not even all stupid straight men) say these things…and honestly, dykes say really bigoted things too, like knocking down “breeders” and kink people often tell “vanilla” people that they just haven’t found their kink yet. I wrote about this type of discrimination here on my professional site.

So yes, it’s funny.  But I think that when we share funny things like this, we also need to have some sort of discussion about how we can change this, and how we can ourselves not be discriminatory to other groups because we hold on to our own identities so strongly (as do the “stupid straight men” represented here).

Just my two cents…

-Essin’ Em

I need your help times 2.

A) I’m trying to figure out a good “pose.”  As their site says, it should represent sexual sexual freedom, what it means to you, how you express it.  I had several ideas, from doing a blind lady justice thing with scales and hand cuffs and rainbows, to being suspended in rope with my cane. I just don’t know.  I express sexual freedom by being me; by being open and honest and educatory and transparent and loud and stubborn everyday. How do I express that visually? I’d love any ideas you may have.

B) I’m in need of a photographer.  I love love love working with Michael Barone, and I think this is right up his alley. However, he lives in Pennsylvania, and I won’t be going there before May. I also contacted a local photographer I’ve met here in Phoenix who I think does excellent work and would get the whole sexual freedom thing, but she hasn’t responded to me.  This is where you come in; do you know someone in the Phoenix/Tucson area that would be interested and does great photography?  Or someone in RI (I’ll be there March 15th and 16th) or NY (I’ll be on Long Island April 1-4th)?

Any advice, suggestions, support, etc would be very much appreciated!

<3

-Essin’ Em

What is it?

It’s the Go Girl, provided to me for inspection and review by Babeland.

It comes in Camo (above, which we got) or pink.  Not so much my thing. What is it? It’s a STP (stand to pee) device, useable for all sorts of things from gender varient people wanting to use urinals to going camping or even rocking out at musical or Pride festivals. It’s an easier way to pee standing up.

Now, I’ve tried something similar before, also from Babeland last fall; the P style (read my review). I was excited to see what made this one different, and hopefully better, and even chatted it up on twitter with the lovely Nina Hartley.

This review may turn into a comparison of the two. Sorry, but I think that is more helpful.

The Go Girl wins for transit, that’s for sure. It’s flexible, so you can roll it up, put it in this cute little tube it came in, put said tube (and TP if you want) in the little Go Girl plastic bag it came with and done. It’s tiny – you can put it in your purse, pocket, back pack, even sock.  Contrast this to the long and fairly rigid P-Style, and Go Girl wins out on transportable-ness.

How about usability? P-Style wins. Hands down. Both Q and I tried the Go Girl….it aims well, yes, and fits fairly well in the crotch-al region. However, we both had our own issue; when she was using it, she over flowed the cup part, and had to work on slowing down/stopping her urination stream, which is not easy to do.  Mine seemed to be ok as far a speed/quanity was concerned, but I somehow wound up dripping it down my leg (perhaps it was trying to use it while wearing a skirt?). Contrast this with the P-style, which was easy to use, didn’t overflow, and was no drip. Plus, with the P-style, the harder surface can be used to wipe excess pee off in a forward motion much more easily. P-style wins on action.

Both are fairly easy to clean, both can be wiped down easily, both have color options.  All in all, I’d say take the P-style if you have room (they make cute little baggies for it), but the Go-Girl if you have a space/packing issue. One last thought; I think Go Girl is a really stupid name to market something that will be very useful to gender variant folks.  Q certainly doesn’t identify as a girl (nor do I for that matter), and I can’t see a lot of trans men and genderqueer people being like “let me just grab my go girl” with it’s pink packaging.  Marketing could certainly have done better on this part.

5 stars for the concept for Go Girl, but only 3 for actual function.

I wonder what Nina thought of it…

Click here to get a Go Girl of your own, or click here if you’re more in the mood for the P Style.

-Essin’ Em

This past week, while in San Francisco, I went to the pier with the adult part of They Belong to Us. While there, we stopped at this awesome sock store, where I got ranbow socks with little cat paw prints (which I may have lost already — we’ve unpacked and I can’t find them!), rainbow knee socks, the above rainbow leg warmers, and red/black/grey argyle socks with little skulls. The latter are a bit to small for my oh-so-msucled calfs, so I have to figure that out.

Anyways, it was all rainy and drizzly on Friday, and of course I wanted to wear a skirt anyways. So, in order to keep my legs dry-ish, and add a spash of color to my ensemble, you can see the above rainbow awesome-ness that was worn with a grey skirt, purple top and snow leopard scarf.  Yeah, I’m that queer.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday!

-Essin’ Em

Have decided to start adding some picture content/links each week of hot queer, kinky, and/or sex positive porn.  Kink.com does a great job with their models, and this hot medical scene on Hogtied.com with Calico is no exception. I’ve had the pleasure of meeting her, and she’s even hotter, sweeter and more brilliant in person, but she’s a great kink model as well.  Click here to enjoy more free photos!