Sexuality Happens

So, taking a break from the more traditional sex toys like vibrators and the like, I thought I’d get me a set of the newest Lelo pleasure objects; the Lelo Boa Pleasure ties. Of course, although they come in many colors, I went for black.

They are made out of this beautiful satin (or satin like) material, and have D-rings (like those nylon webbing belts that you used to love), and then apparently little “pearl sacks” on the end to provide weight. As far as how they looked, they certainly looked beautiful, luxurious, and like some naughty fun. They came in a more traditional Lelo box, which was great for arriving, but I had a hell of a time getting them to fit BACK in the box. I wound up storing them in one of my collection of sex toy storage boxes, for ease of storage.

Now…I’m sorry to say it, but as far as practical use, these sucked. Period. I mean, you don’t want to tie knots in the fabric, because then they are hard to get out, or if you can get them out, they leave kinks in the nice fabric (and not the hot and sexy kind). Sooo…once you get someone’s wrist or ankle in them, pull the fabric through the D-ring…you know have someone’s limb secured, but no way to actually secure it to anything else. And the pearl sacks (which are just an odd concept to begin with) don’t actually provide more than a few ounces of weight, so I’m not sure what they are supposed to weight/hold down/counter balance. I wasn’t impressed, to be honest. I think we tried using them 2 or 3 times, and just gave up. It was much easier to use cuffs and ties that were actually meant to be used, instead of designed for look and not for action.

Instead, I’d recommend these sexy cuffs with under bed restraint system if you’re really looking to tie someone up, or even just this cheap cotton black Japanese rope for a little bondage action.

Nice try Lelo — these ties look beautiful and elegant, but honestly, just don’t cut it for more than sittin’ pretty. Stick with your amazing vibrators — you have yet to go wrong there!

-Essin’ Em

Guess who is coming to visit me in Phoenix today?

Why, my favorite moose of course! That’s right, my secondary play partner/primadary friend from Denver is coming to visit this weekend.

Did I ever tell you how I met? I was having dinner with two members of the kink community; one in Denver, one visiting, and I mentioned I liked fisting.  The gentleman I was with suggested one of his partners was kind of queer, and would probably like fisting.  I smiled and nodded, and kind of let it go.

Later that night, I went to a play party at the RACK Room, to play pinata with my visitor from Utah. We put candy all over her, and beat it off her.  Afterwards, I met Evey, my soon to be moose.  It was one of those “ohhhh, so you’re the girl your partner wants me to meet and possibly fist, right?” moments of complete awkwardness. Remember, I’m incredibly awkward. 

She let me do a spanking and paddling scene with her. It was fun and entertaining.

Since then, we’ve built our relationship in various directions. We’ve played together, I’ve played tic tac toe on her with a knife, we’ve had sex, I’ve tied her up, she’s cleaned my apartment, we’ve cuddled, hugged, chatted, cupped, fired, talked, and much much more. I love her to death, and view her as a partner, even though we’re no longer sexually active.

I can’t wait to see her, and spend the weekend with her. I have many a plan, and look forward to enacting them.

She writes her own blog; Voyeur on Display – you should check it out!

And with that, I’m off to go have fun with my moose! I have some surprises in store.

-Essin’ Em

PS.  Isn’t she adorable?

We’re back for Eye Candy this week with one of my favorite queer-tastic, kinky as fuck and sexy as anything queer porn star Madison Young. This red head runs her own kinky bondage site, but also models for other sites, such as Hogtied.com, which is where this week’s pictures are from.

I’ve been lucky enough to meet and hang out with Madison multiple times, and she is just as sexy in real life. Add that to her ridiculous sexy brain and cutting wit, and you’ve really got the full package. I’m in awe of her and her life in general, and this shoot just shows off how much she loves what she does, plus her incredible kinkability.

Click here to see the rest of the pictures and the video from this hot bondage shoot with Madison Young.

I’m back again with the super hot, super queer, super smart Loreli Lee.  Last week, I showed her on WaterBondage.com in a sexy and submissive kind of way. Today, I’m showing a little bit of her sexy, dominant, take control, Mistress side of her on MenInPain.com.

This blonde bombshell is beautiful incredibly delicious regardless of whether she’s being submissive or dominant, and I think the pictures from this men in pain scene are incredibly hot.

Click here to see the video and all the photos from this hot, queer, woman in charge scene where Lorlei totally dominants this muscular guy and shows him who is in control. Mmm.

Behold, I have rope. More specifically, Japanese Bondage Rope, thanks to the folks at SexToy.com.

Why rope? Well, as we all know, I’ve always loved stuff of a kinker variety, and of all the BDSM/Fetish toys I’ve tried, I’ve never really done rope. Yes, I’ve review a few rope bondage “how-to” books like Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Ropes and Midori’s The Seductive Art of Japanese Rope Bondage. I’ve tied up, I’ve even been suspended a time or two back in Denver…but honestly, rope has never held much of an allure for me.  I like things that get stuff going quickly (like pretty restraints) so that it is both fast and easy to get someone (usually Q) restrained, and then just as fast and easy to get them undone at the end.

But I like the look of rope in some of the decorative ways, and I really like that this rope is already black, so it matches everything I have, no dying needed. Plus, I recently attend Lee Harrington’s basic ropes class at Fascinations. And it was cool. And I wanted to learn more about ropes and playing with them, and all that jazz.

So while I usually review sex toys, this week, I’m reviewing rope.

The rope itself isn’t hemp or nylon and anything shiny and fancy like rope enthusiasts tend to love. That’s ok; I’m a rope newbie, and I’m not willing to spend $10 a foot for some rope of fancy-ness before I figure out if I even like the damn stuff.

It’s 32 feet long, which seems like an awkward number, since most of the rope books I’ve read require lengths of 10, 15, 25, 50 feet, etc. I haven’t seen a lot of “32 feet” or “16 feet” lengths required. So basically, I wish it had been 50 feet, so I could cut it into more useful and more managable lengths of rope. However, better 32 feet than some of the cheap-o rope I’ve seen for sale that is all of 8 or 10 feet, with which you can do very little.

My other problem was that the ends were fraying. Now, with my nylon rope, I just burn the ends, voila.  However, with natural fibers like cotton, it’ll just light up on fire. There is some special way to end ropes by wrapping string around them, but you know me; when it comes to bondage, I’m more of an instant gratification kind of gal.  Ergo, I just tied really small knots. Did this make it a little more difficult to actually use the rope? Yes. But it was easier and quicker and I just got the damn thing done.

As far as using the rope, I made some pretty gauntlets on my arm, and then I used it for quick bondage; speed cuffs, tying Q’s wrist restraints together, and those kind of things.

The rope is great beginner rope. Obviously, it’s nothing amazing, and so if you’re going to be a rope slut, I might go invest in some high quality, frou frou stuff. However, for someone just starting in? This rope is brilliant, it comes in black, purple or red, which I LOVE, and it’s a decent amount. I’d give it 3.5, or maybe even 4 stars, out of 5.

Click here to get your own length of rope!

Photo Credit: John Foley

Given all of my joint awesomeness (read; suckiness), there are a lot of things I can’t do bondage wise. I’ve tried being suspended before, but having my arms bound behind my back cause immense pain…and after the 20 or 30 minutes it took to actually get me up in the air, everything hurt badly, so I had to come down, and it took another 20 minutes to get me out of everything.

Another such thing is the hogtie. I DEFINITELY should not be put in a full hogtie unless you want my pelvis displacing again.  No fun I tell you.  However, here is a partial one I did for the shoot, kind of a damsel in distress kind o’ thing.  Same photographer as last week’s hand HNT.  An odd shoot, because it’s the first shoot Q ever came to and I hate wearing gags of any sort, but overall, some great pictures.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday to everyone!

-Essin’ Em

Photo Credit: John Foley

It’s not often that I wear gags. I hate them hate them hate them.  I have epic TMJD, some wearing them hurts. Add to that my anxiety and panic at not being able to breath or swallow (which you can while wearing gags; it’s just more difficult), and I just choose not to wear them.

However, I recently did a fetish shoot, and he had a cool harness gag on hand. Q was there, so I felt less nervous having it on, ergo, I tried it for a few frames. And I really liked this over all picture, though I still don’t like gags, and think I look really silly in them.

So please enjoy one of the fruits of this shoot’s labor. And realize that you may never see me in a harness gag again!

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday!

-Essin’ Em

She was nervous on the way there, and asked me to drive her car.  I did, although driving in a perfectly lace corset and 5″ heels is no joke.

She was nervous as we checked in, showing our brand spanking new APEX membership cards, and checked in.

She was nervous as we got brief introductions to all the people there; girls, women, butches, femmes, dykes, bisexuals, bois, grrls, etc. It wasn’t really a queer party per se, but I did feel like we fit.

She was wearing my favorite outfit of hers – a black shirt and a red and black tie, to match my flame corset perfectly. God, she is so god damn fucking hot.

She was nervous as we sat their, munching on cheese and pre-cut fruit platters.

She was nervous when I open the toy bag, selected a few floggers, a paddle, some black zipties, vampire gloves, a knife, a vibrator, a cane and 6 clothespins, which I clipped onto her tie for ease of access.

She was very nervous as I lead her into the jail cell room, until she realized no one was there.

She was only moderately nervous as I kissed her deeply, pulling first on her tie to bring her closer, and then on her hair, as I grabbed it and held her into me.

She seemed only a little nervous as I undid her shirt buttons and jeans, leaving her in only a black ribbed tank, boxes, and of course, her tie.

She was a bit more nervous as I bent her over the table, using the zipties to hold her arms in place as I pulled down her boxers. My hands gently slid over her as, until I began to spank her, giving her a warm up.  And then, I moved on to the paddle, and then, the cane.

I had to remind her to breathe.  We need to work on that, for both of us. Breathing is, shockingly, important.

She relaxed as I rand the sharp vampire gloves and knife over her ass and back.  Again, she tensed up as I hit her with the floggers…first, the smaller, more stingy one, and then, the larger, heavy, distinctly thuddy one. Red and black, of course.

I cut the tied, and brought her to the cross, removing her clothes completely.  I made use of the clothespins – a few on each nipple, and the vibrator, as I alternated it between nipples and cunt, all the while still kissing her, biting her, licking her, playing with the clothespins on her nipples. I slapped her face a bit when she forgot to call me Mistress.

She was only a smidgen nervous when I made her lie on the table, holding the vibrator to her clit. 

She wasn’t nervous at all when I slid my fingers into her…first two, then three, then four.

She wasn’t a bit nervous as I fucked her on that table with my left hand, reaching up to pinch her nipples with my right.

She wasn’t nervous, not in any sense of the word, as I fucked her silly, in my corset and short skirt, hand disappearing into her cunt, her moans making my own drip with anticipation.

-Essin’ Em

Some people love love love rope. They love the feel of it on their skin, the feel of being secured, the look, the process of getting there. Others love doing the tying – the rope running through their fingers, the beautiful designs that they create. People can spend hours with rope, getting in and out of different ties, wearing it around, etc.

I am not one such person. Rope frustrated me.  It takes so long to do, and it really tends to cut into my play time.  I’ve been suspended, but it took so long to get up, that by the time I was flying, all my joints hurt, and I was up for all of 4 or 5 minutes before I had to come down. I’d rather just use good restraints and a spreader bar.

However, I have decided that it’s important that I learn how to do SOME rope stuff. Not a ton, but some good basic ties. They will definitely come in handy.  I’ve taught myself the gauntlet/corset ties already, since I can do them on me, and don’t need someone to practice on. Next step is to find a willing Guinea pig who will let me try out some basic bondage ties on them. Hmmmm…

I have both Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Ropes and Midori’s The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage. While I am completely broke, I would love to get Lee Harrington‘s Shibari You Can Use. If anyone else has any other suggestions on how to learn some basic basic basic rope stuff that even I can understand, I welcome any suggestions.  Otherwise, I’ll definitely update you as to how this…adventure of mine turns out.

-Essin’ Em

Liberator was kind enough to send me a smaller item to review this time…you know, until Q and I move in together and have more room for the items I’m dying for, like the Esse or the Buckaroo (hint hint, nudge nudge).

What did I get? A set of beautiful crimson silk binding sashes — two sashes of 14 feet a piece.  You can also get a set of two 7 foot sashes, OR a deluxe set of all four sashes.

I was a little apprehensive. I mean, the sashes are absolutely stunning.  I didn’t want to play too rough with them, for fear for breaking them, or lighting them on fire, or getting wax/bodily fluids on them, etc. I held off using them until I could show them off for everyone. You know, my Femme side coming out and all.

So I waited until Spanktrum (Denver’s new women and trans play party) that I hosted back in October.  Q and I went, and before I did a fabulous and fun fire scene, I tried tying her up in a variety of pretty ways.  Some worked better than others, but always, in the end, the silk wound up sliding down her arms, and the knots/bows tightened too quickly.

Then I was lucky.  A certain feisty Femme friend of mine wanted to be tied to the St. Andrews cross and have everyone in the party come kiss, lick, suck, hit and play with her.  Since she’s not into super tight/serious bounds, and she is into pretty things like I am, I decided to use the beautiful sashes to wrap around her arms and tie her into place. Let me just tell you, she looked even more stunning than she already did in her vintage style garter belt.

These are her arms:

Only problem?  After a while, the sashes tightened a bit, and I had to let her down earlier than planned. On that note, they’re not good for any serious bondage, weight bearing bondage, or long term bondage.  On the other hand, if you’re just getting into tying each other up, these would be a really great, and beautiful option for a new bondage lover, or someone just wanting to lightly tie up their lover. I do enjoy the variety of sizes and colors, and look forward for using this to help out newbies, while still being beautiful and classy.

Also, you can keep the sashes in the package that they came in, which is really nice. You wash them in cold water, and iron as needed.  They also can attach well to Black Label liberator furniture — in my case, I tried on the Black Label Scoop.  I’d say 4 stars overall (out of 5).

To get your own set of these stunning sashes (in any of three colors; black, red or “champagne”), click here.

-Essin’ Em